Inhale

Chapter 12:

Corey yawned as he got up, another rough night of sleeping due to nightmares. Same old same old.

He had stayed at Joey's a week now, and was still not used to being inside. Joey had called up shawn, much to Corey's dismay and explained the situation and shawn said they might as well have taken a break from band practise, but not rehearsing at home, for christmas since he wanted to take his family down state. And corey was so glad he at least was inside for the winter.

He hated to admit it. He liked sleeping here. Joey seemed to be pretty rich. And the bed was huge, and comfortable and warm, corey liked to sleep in the middle and lay on his back.

The duvet was heavy, and welcoming as he could wrap himself in it. And the pillows were huge and soft where he could rest his heavy head. Joey always made sure to make corey a hot water bottle and give him some blankets before he went to bed. And he had taken a liking to that teddy bear.

The lack of noise was strange too. Corey was used to other people talking in the middle of the night, people laughing, people dying, people fucking and crying and screaming and shouting and  all sorts. He also enjoyed not being made jump by cars and trucks and motorcycles and bicycle bells. Sirens and megaphones and loud ass music, loud ass shit music may he add, coming from cars. He felt he could hear himself think. And a lot of the time he didnt want to think but it did him well a little.

He hated the fact he was liking it.

But he wasnt going to let himself get used to it.

No.

He couldnt. If Joey threw him out, hed have to get used to the streets again, or if Joey hurt him and he had to run away.

He felt awful in himself for having those thoughts, that Joey would even dare lay a finger on him, but he had to. He had to so he could survive and not go through anything again.

He couldnt.

But he liked the access to a shower, and to shave and to food.

He shouldn't be he did.

He liked attempting to get clean. But it depressed him. The thing is, when you're someone like corey, you scrub, and you scrub, and you bleed from scrubbing and the dirt is still there. You use soap, you use water, you use bleach for crying out loud, and it's still there, still easily seen, and it stands out again your skin this dirt. You could try pick it off but it only remains. And everyone can sense it. Everyone knows. Corey was so tired of being so dirty and so impure. He was dirt and nothing could change that. He could tell Joey could tell and he hated that.

He desperately wanted to be clean, but that was never going to happen and it was  sending him into a spiral of hatred for everyone but mainly himself.

Yet he still enjoyed trying. He just hated the disappointment.

He looked up at Joey once he reached the kitcehn who was dressed up, a leather skirt, fishnets and a dress shirt with a red tie. His makeup look pretty good corey would admit.

"You look good. What's the occasion?" Corey asked

Joey shrugged "thank you. But theres no occasion. I just felt like dressing up."

"Oh...okay."

"But I'm taking you out." Joey shrugged

Corey rolled his eyes "finally had enough of me?"

"I get the low attempt at humor corey." Joey said as corey shrugged "but no. I'm taking you clothes shopping."

"But I cant afford anything-"