Ruins

37

"So Alden and who..." I scratched at my neck.

"Luke." One of the new girls, Magna spoke. "He's one of ours."

I watched the deaf one, Connie, looking at Daryl and then looked at him myself. He was peering down at the map.

The thought that Daryl actually came back to watch someone else's child didn't just infuriate me, it disappointed me. Daryl had already proved to be an amazing father but... This was disheartening.

I walked away from the groups planning to go out and found Noah.

"Hi momma." He grinned.

"Hi baby." I couldn't hold back my smile. No part of him reminded me of Negan. He had my golden green eyes and shapeful lips. "What are you doing?" I asked.

"Reading to Dog." He giggled.

"Really?" I chuckled. "Is he enjoying it?" I asked, raking my fingers over Dog's neck. He flipped over, lapping at my hand.

"Yeah." He looked at me, petting him. "Are we gonna stay here? With Daddy?"

I sighed, letting my smile fall. "For a little." I nodded, taking his book. "Can Mommy read to you guys?" He nodded his head and scooted into my side, letting Dog's head rest in his lap. "Far out in the sea, lived a fish. No ordinary fish- do you know what ordinary means?"

"Uh, no."

"It means normal." I told him. "He was the most beautiful fish in the ocean." I continued. I looked up seeing Daryl watching us, then let him sit beside me, joined us. "'Play with us Rainbow Fish.' But Rainbow Fish was proud, and swam passed them... Was that nice of him to do?" I asked.

"No, he should've stayed and played." Noah shook his head with big eyes. I felt Daryl's arm curl around my back and lay over Dog. I turned and looked up at him, earning a small nod from him.

I got the strangest urge to cry, but sucked it up and kept reading.

"I ain't goin' out, m'gonna keep working on the girl, see if she'll talk." Daryl said. I nodded, spotting Connie looking our way.

"Daryl-" He caught on and looked back at me. "If this is over... If you're moving on you need to tell me, I deserve that. I don't want to sit here waiting for something that's never-"

"Hey..." He stopped me, taking my hand. He shook his head. "I ain't moving on. I still love you Sam. Always will."

I tilted my head, not entirely believing him.

"C'mere." He sighed, tugging me forward, hugging me tight and long. I relished in the memories, and sighed as he let me go. I looked back to where Noah was asleep with Dog on a bale of hay.

"We have a pretty sweet kid, huh?" I leaned into Daryl's shoulder.

"Yeah, he's pretty great."

That night, instead of in the bed in the Barrington house I found myself at the bottom of the stables. I don't know why, but I climbed up, finding Dog and Daryl.

"What're you doin'?" He grumbled. I'd obviously woke him.

"I don't know." I shook my head, even though he probably couldn't see me.

It was silent, before he sighed. "C'mere." He said. "Down Dog." He spoke, easily, getting the Dog to move. I took the dog's spot under this arm, and just enjoyed his scent, and warmth.

"Daryl?"

"Yeah?" His breath was hot over my face.

"Do you still have my ring?" I played with his hand that was over my shoulder.

"Of course I still have it. You're my wife, whether we're together or apart, Sam. I love you." His hand slid across my face, tugging me forward.

I didn't want to give in so quickly, but his familiar touch was so comforting.

I pressed our lips together, and held his face, tugging him in and kissing him harder, giving into his warm electricity that I fell in love with. I turned to my side, and threw my leg over him, laying flat against him.

"Let me feel you Daryl. I need to." I disconnected our lips. "Please."

"Yeah baby?" He breathed.

"Yeah." I sat up, sliding my hands up his shirt.

I wasn't sure how I ended up here again, but the immediate regret didn't wash over me this time.

"'Ere." He grunted, sitting up and taking something from his neck. I felt him grab my hand and slide my ring on.

"Thank you." I nuzzled into his neck, running my finger over the carving on the bottom of the ring.

"Thank you, for taking me back. I don't deserve you, or Noah."

"Hey I haven't taken you back." I sighed. "I still need to see that you want this. That you want to stay- I..." I closed my eyes. "Do you remember when the group found me... After the prison, at the church."

"Course." He answered quickly.

"Do you remember how you felt? Seeing me... Skinny and weak like that?"

He was quiet.

"You can't be out there alone anymore." I shook my head. "You're son is growing up without you and I can't understand how that isn't enough-"

"It is-"

"Then prove it." I breathed. "You owe that to him."

I felt him grab my hip and and tug me on top of him again.

"You feel so good..." He groaned, letting his hands rub down my back and butt. He grabbed my butt, lightly, and sighed. "I missed you."

"I know, I missed you too." I laid my head on his chest, listening to the familiar rhythm. "He talks about you constantly..."

"I'm a piece of shit."

His words hurt me, but I let out a chuckle and agreed with him. I knew he wasn't a piece of shit, but he need to change something.

"You are a good dad, Daryl. And I love seeing the man you've become. It just scares me because... I mean we've lost so many people- we still are losing people-"

"You're not gonna lose me-"

"I'm not scared of you dying Daryl. You know how to take care of yourself. I'm just... You can only take so much before, you lose yourself. And I can see that. You can't fool me." I sat up.

I couldn't see him in the cover of the dark, but I know he was looking up at me.

"Long as I got you guys I'll be alright." He planted his hands on my hips. "I promise."

I nodded, even if he couldn't see me.

His hands gripped my hips, holding me down roughly.

"Daryl." I whimpered, holding his shoulders, and swallowing hard. I could feel him in his lap again, and let out a short moan.

"Come on." He held the nape of my neck, tugging me down into him. "Let me make it up to you." He whispered, making me gasp at the warmth he spread over my neck. "Yeah baby?" He asked, turning us, to lay me on my side.

"Okay." I let out a pant. I felt his hand crawl up my side and hold my jaw.

His lips bit at my neck, I tilted my neck, giving him more access.

"This doesn't mean we're good." I panted.

"No?" He asked, slapping the inside of my thighs a few times, making me open them.

"No-" I gasped, at the pressure of his fingers.

"Still ain't good?" He tested.

"No, Daryl were still not-" I gasped louder this time, and cut it off with a long moan.

"Shhh!" He chuckled, retracting his hand to squeeze my cheeks together and kiss me.