Black And White : A Niall Horan Fanfiction

31.

I reached Niall just as he was about to open his car door. His back was to me and I pulled on his shoulder to make him turn around.

"What's wrong? You said you were going to stay for breakfast," I said in a worried voice.

"I was I don't want to be treated like a celebrity. I know I'm famous but it's exhausting having to answer everyone's questions all the time and trying to live up to what everyone sees on the news and social media. I'm sorry," Niall said. His voice was sad, no more laughter or happiness.

He opened his car door but I grabbed his hand before he climbed in. I can't push any words out so I hold on tightly to his hand.

"Lily, let go. I shouldn't be here. Go have a nice brithday with your family," he said and pulled his hand away from mine.

Tears brew in my eyes and I didn't even bother to try and hold them in.

"No," I said in a plain voice.

He turned around and wiped away a tear with a soft finger. His soft lips pressed lightly to my forehead just like he did when he left in New York. It was then that I realised I couldn't loose him, not again.

I watched him climb in his car. As he started his engine I ran around the back of the car and opened the passenger door. I sat there and stared blankly out the wind screen.

The engine switched off which made me turnmy head to look at Niall. He was sat like me, blue eyes looking out onto the road. I went back to my position and began to speak.

"That night, in New York, I was so pissed at you for ruining my dress. The next morning, in your hotel room, I was freaking out so much because one direction is the biggest band in the world. That afternoon, when we went walking round the city, I was scared the whole time that I would say something stupid and make you think I was an idiot. That evening, when we kissed outside my hotel room, was the first time I'd relaxed in a long time. The next day, when I went out to see the city with Liv, I was thinking about you the whole day. That night, I found it so hard to get to sleep because of the note you'd put under my door. The day after that, when we went for that picnic by the river, I felt so free being next to you. Later that day, when you told me you were leaving for LA next morning, it took all my strength not to burst out crying. That night, when you walked away from me infront of my hotel room, my heart broke."

My eyes had turned to water falls but I continued to speak.

"The other evening, when I saw you in the restaurant, my stomach twisted into a knot because I was so nervous to talk to you. That night, when you drove me home, I was desperate to kiss you. Yesterday night, when I called you, my heart was beating 100 miles an hour waiting for you to arrive at my house. Yesterday night, when we kissed, I wanted to kill Tyler when he walked in on us because it meant we had to stop. This morning, when I noticed you stayed the night, the break in my heart disappeared and suddenly I felt happy."

I rubbed my eyes with the back of my hand and sniffed. Niall stayed quiet so I kept going even though I didn't know what else to say.

"But now, sitting here next to you, I don't know what I will do if you drive away. I need you Niall. I'm so sorry if that sounds stupid but it's true. I need you more than anything in the whole world. And I know I'm not famous or beautiful and I don't have loads of money or even my own house. But I love you. I love you so much. So please, don't drive away," I beg. Both my cheeks are soaking.

Niall didn't say anything, he just stayed silent. I nodded and whispered ok before opening the car door. I walked back to the house with my arms crossed over my chest. When I reached the front door I shut it quickly, not wanting to see Niall through the car window.

"Lily, are you ok?" my dad's voice asked from behind me. I didn't reply, I couldn't reply. Instead I walked up to my room and shut my door. I climbed onto my bean bag and Evie ran over. She lay high up on my chest and I hugged her and sobs escaped my throat. My eyes squeezed shut and I prayed that the pain would just go away.

I felt like a baby for crying so much over something that wasn't even that big of a deal, but for some reason, that day, it felt like it was the biggest disaster in the world.