Solar Knight: Star Dust -book 2-

Chapter 16: panic on deck *

"Don't stop! Keep it going! We gotta keep up the illusion that we have a large crew! " I shouted, while puffing my pipe.

"We're doing our best sir! They're wiping the floor with us out there! " one of the crewmen said.

"Aye, they're not shabby flying and shooting! Well, most of em that is. They're still skilled enough to blow up over a fifth of our ships captain! " said another crew member.

"We gotta make it look like we have a massive army under our belt! They can't know that we only have a hundred and fifty men! " I said.

"Actually boss, make that one hundred forty nine. Jerry didn't eject. " said one of the crew mates in the observation room, over the intercom.

"Are you sure he didn't? " I asked.

"Affirmative captain. " he said.

"I'll promote whoever shot him down... "

"Nah, he crashed into the moon sir.... "

"How in the- leave it to Jerry to crash into the friggin moon... "

"He did the impossible sir.... "

I pressed on the radio button and announced "We're finally rid of the dodo, Jerry! The last of the dodos! " to be met with cheer on all radios.... Until the unthinkable happened.

"I'm A-OK sir! Noooo need to worry, ayup!" Jerry said in a dumb manner over the radio.

Everybody groaned, someone even suggested to quickly gun him down, but I declined since he was our own.... Sadly.

"Alright just... Dock in and swap ships.... " I sighed as everyone quietly groaned.

"Aye aye, capn! " he said.

We watched the screen as the moron began to dock.

".....why is he trying to dock in the cannons? " I asked.

"Because he's Jerry sir.... " said the observation crewman.

"Hoo wee he's trying sir! " said the other one.

"Hmmmmm.... "

He tried to back up and find the docks again.

"Alrighty sir, I'm docking!...... Wait, that's a black HOOOOOOOO- KZZZRT!!" his radio cut out to silence.

".....did he look funny when he got sucked in? " said the same crewman.

We all gotta chuckle from that remark. I then announced that Jerry was truly gone and everyone sighed in relief.

We all hated the dodos. They were a dumbass race that would either get themselves killed, never listened and comprehended tasks, make dumb choices that affected everyone, and just generally made our race look bad.  Schools would turn them down immediately, because of how dumb they were..... And they didn't care.... Till they walked into traffic and died by falling into the sewers....

We didn't hunt them down or anything, why do that when they die off from sheer stupidity? Another fact is that, most won't marry dodos because trying to get them to understand what marriage is, let alone mating, is like talking to a brick!  The high priests would literally just sign the papers and call it a day if a dodo marriage consent was even manage to happen!

"Alright, back to these earthlings.... They seem to be serious about their assault.... Time to get serious back...." I said, looking at the battle outside.

"Aye sir, if we don't do something, they'll tear through our ships before we know it! " said the observation crewman.

"Know what? I think it's time to send out one of our specialist squads.... The hot pink flamingos! With their expertise in plasma engineering, they will fry their ships to a crisp! " I said with a chuckle.

-HOT PINK FLAMINGOS COME TO COMMUNICATIONS, HOT PINK FLAMINGOS COME TO COMMUNICATIONS-

Blared the intercoms on the vessel. Soon after, they entered the communications room where I was. Think earth's flamingos, but with a bit more meat to em. They stand upright and have hands as well, to operate their space crafts, known as the "Hot Pink Flyers". They wore standardized Avarians air force attire, which was semi skin tight, in this case pink, suits that was worn from from the neck down, stopping at the hands and feet. They wore a special type of goggles for  UV protection, in case they looked in the sun's direction.

The five brought their feet together, and then bowed in a majestic manner.

"You called us captain? What do you need us to fry? " said Jamus, their leader.

"Gotta group of hot shots outside, figured you'd like to show them who the true hot shots are! " I said with a smirk.

"Oh... Erm.... " said Rufus, third in command.

"What? " I asked.

"Weeee were hoping you wanted us to fry some crag worms.... It's getting close to meal time... " said Damus.

"Yea, I wanna devour some grub sir! " said Lamus.

"Rufus, damus, lamus, lupus, shofus, OK listen..... If I had my way, I'd call you all DOOFUS..... but I will remain calm and refrain from it..... Do you hear the explosions, the sirens, and cannon fire? " I said, trying not to explode.

They looked at each other, then outside, then nod in agreement.

"This is why people refer to us as bird brains, mkay..... So if that is all going on outside..... WHERE DOES THAT WARRANT LUNCH TIME?!?!? " is shouted.

They immediately jumped and stood at attention, with salute.

"FORGIVE OUR IGNORANCE CAPTAIN LUDWIG VON QROW SIR!! " they said in unison.

"I'mma pirate captain, not military captain.... " I said with a sigh.

"We will depart immediately sir! We will set their vessels ablaze as a message that we're not playing around! " said Jamus.

"Indeed! They'll learn to not mess with us one way or another! " said Shofus.

"Alright, deploy immediately! " I commanded.

"AYE AYE SIR!! " they said, scampering out into the halls, making ticking sounds with their bare talons.

After that short meeting, I looked outside to see the hot pink flamingos blast off into combat, streaking pink flames behind them. They will take us more seriously now.......