BLACK ON BLACK | TK

Chapter Two

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"I want you
And I always will
I wish I was worth
But I know what you deserve
You know I'd rather drown
Than to go on without you
But you're pulling me down."

The days leading to Taehyung's 18th birthday were the most exciting days of his life.

He's been surrounded all his life by couples who had met each other through the Soulmate Program so his perception on it was immensely influenced by the people around him. Soulmates were destined for each other and meeting yours meant meeting your fated one and developing what people knew as true love.

Taehyung wanted to have that. To know what true love felt. To have someone who would love his good sides, but adore his bad sides as well—to have someone who could show him the endless string of emotions that enveloped love.

So when his 18th birthday started getting closer, Taehyung decided to take the HLA test in advance so that his DNA sampled pen could arrive on his birthday—the perfect present.

All his life, he had heard stories. Whether they came from his family, his friends' families or from the numerous TV shows based on the Soulmate Program, it didn't matter. They all seemed to bring good news and lead towards a happy ending.

To say the teenager was a follower of the society in which they lived was an understatement. Taehyung was one of the few people who thought that, as long as someone was decided as your partner from the very beginning, no one else should take their place in your heart. So, until the age of 18, Taehyung didn't have any relationships—he didn't allow someone else to touch him even if many girls and even boys showed their interests in him. He didn't believe in other types of love, only believing in what has been taught to him all his life. He only believed in the words that were to appear on his skin in the future, leading him towards his soulmate and towards his happy ending.

However, the fact that nothing appeared on his body after he wrote whole paragraphs disappointed the teenager, making him believe that the love he knew and desired didn't seem to be meant for him.

But he never gave up.

Taehyung was naive and determined so, until the age of 20, the boy refused to interact with other people, even though sometimes—on most nights—loneliness destroyed his insides and his body felt like it was freezing due to the cold breeze that persisted in the room even when the weather outside was warm.

Even in the warmest days, under the soothing rays of the sunshine, there was an icy feeling nestled deeply into his body.

His two dogs sometimes jumped on his bed and fell asleep next to him but it wasn't enough, the warmth of their bodies wasn't what Taehyung so badly needed. Nothing was enough, so to get rid of the thoughts that clouded his mind, making him seem the most depressed person in the neighborhood—not like he wasn't close—the boy decided to bury himself into what he loved because it was something he's been doing his whole life, a routine. He loved the idea of loving, but he also loved creating so for hours, until the sun went down, leaving behind the darkness the boy so clearly despised, Taehyung drew. He sketched new works in pencil only to then outline them with thick pieces of charcoal in a messy style, which always left stains on his face and fingers, sometimes even on his clothes if he was wearing something light. When the charcoal became too hot between his fingers, Taehyung lifted the set of brushes from under the table, then started painting.

He enjoyed the idea of freedom—he enjoyed creating landscapes, maybe even portraits of people he had never seen or even if he did, he did not remember their names, only passing features that were so unique they stayed printed in his mind. Two moles above the upper lip of a girl he had once seen in the park, one man he had noticed walking on the busy streets of Seoul whose cheek had a pink birthmark that resembled a rose—those were the details that remained in his mind, the details that he added to his paintings.