I would die for you, but I won't live for you -Niall Horan au

thirty-five

I watched as my luggage got thrown into the trunk of the taxi along with Riley’s. “Where too?” The driver asked once we got in the car. “Airport.” Riley replied. I couldn’t even speak. The thought of actually leaving the boys had to be the worst feeling. I had lost them two years ago and when they came back, it was a dream come true. I had even prayed to not lose them again.

I guess God wasn’t on my side.

It felt like the ride to the airport took forever but it was only an hour. Once we arrived, I got out of the car and grabbed the suitcases from the trunk as Riley paid the driver.

I followed her through the airport in silence. Neither of us wanted to speak and I guess that was okay. I had felt my phone go off in my pocket and I knew it was the boys. But how could I answer when I was about to leave them? I stood beside Riley as she ordered the tickets. She got one for London, and one for some place in Canada. “Why did you get one for Canada?” I asked once we paid and handed over our luggage. She shrugged and started walking away.

"I thought I’d go visit my family.” She answered. I had actually forgotten she was originally from Canada and half her family still lived out there. “When are you coming back?” I asked. She stopped, looked at me and shrugged again. “Whenever I guess. But I’ll call you.” She smiled. I smiled back but it soon faded once I realized we were at my terminal. The plane was already starting to board so I had to go. “I’ll see you soon.” I said before giving her a hug.

I really did need her for these things, but Riley was hurt too. And when she was hurt, she had her own way of dealing with things. This was one of those ways. She liked to go places and clear her mind. Me? I enjoyed sitting at home watching a sappy love movies and eating my weight in ice cream. I always felt guilty about it afterwards though and went hardcore at the gym.

“Bye.” She hugged back. After we let go of each other, I turned and walked over to my gate. The lady scanned my ticket and I slowly made my way onto the plane. My seat was at the very back and nobody was sitting around me. At least I could have some time to think and maybe fall asleep. But sleeping seemed almost impossible at this point. My head was swirling with thoughts and my heart ached.

So much for something great happening eh Riley?

~*~

I got off the plane, quickly grabbed my luggage and called a cab to get home. It felt so cold and lonely without having Riley and the boys here. I honestly didn’t know what to do with myself. I wanted to eat and watch movies but I couldn’t. I hade some changes to make. All these things came to mind and I quickly grabbed my laptop and emailed Riley. I knew it would cost a lot if I called her, and I wasn’t even sure if she had landed yet.

I told her what I was doing and got started once the email was sent. She might be surprised, but this would help me get my mind off things. And that’s exactly what I needed right now. I jumped in my car and drove off to my work.

“Payton! I thought you were in Florida?” My boss asked once I walked in. The bar was open but there was barley anybody here. “I was. I came home early.” I replied, trying to smile at him. “What about Riley?” He asked. I explained how something had happened and she had to go visit family. I didn’t want to explain everything that happened to us.

He nodded and walked behind the bar. “Want a drink?” he asked. I still had a major headache from last night so I politely declined. “I actually came here for business.” I said. He leaned against the counter top and looked at me. “You want an extra shift or something?” He was always the kind of boss that didn’t want students to work so much that they get stressed.

“No, I’m actually quitting.” I explained. He watched me for a second before nodding his head and telling me he understood. I gave him a quick hug, said bye and told him I’d be sure to come and visit. As I walked through the parking lot to my car, my phone went off. I pulled it out and read the email Riley had sent me.

“Go for it! Change might be good for you. I was thinking about a change for myself as well. Maybe moving here? I know I wouldn’t get to see you, but there isn’t anything for me in London anymore and we could always visit each other.”

I decided I would answer later. Right after I finished everything I had to do. I jumped in the car and drove off to the salon. I sat in a chair right away and smiled at the lady. “What would you like today?” She smiled back.

“Cut it.”