Stumbled In Love [Complete]

31.

I watched as he poked his fork into a piece of vegetable, bringing it up to his mouth, sticking the tip of his tongue out to give it a quick lick before scrunching his nose in distaste and quickly dropping the piece back on his plate. An involuntary smile quickly jumping up to my face as I watched him repeat the process with another random vegetable chunk.

Taking in as he pushed around the food on his plate over and over again, it might have finally sunk in for me what I really liked about Arthit. The fact that the man absolutely never complained.

Ok, wait, before you jump up and down all ready to show me at least 50 examples of his never-ending grumbling list, hear me out first. When I say he never complains, what I mean is for things that actually matter. Things that might even slightly inconvenience people around him.

Case in point in the 20 minutes since he had decided absolutely nothing on his plate was particularly appetizing, he had done three rounds of trying to gulp it down anyway rather than ask me to fetch him something else. Or now that I have managed to pull him out of his apartment once in a while, the brief moments I have to leave his side in a completely new location, he would just stand stiffly in his spot, not moving an inch, never even letting me know that he was uncomfortable surrounded by the unknown, waiting incredibly patiently till he heard a hint of a familiar sound before taking a tentative step towards it. Even the groceries that I bought for him weekly, cause technically he still paid me a hefty salary, was consistent to the last grain of rice. Not one thing changed in the months and months since I had met him to the point that I am sure I could grab everything on his list with my eyes closed now. Well, I guess that was the whole point. His outward grumbling timed rather strategically where he pushed people away before he could ever even need them.

Wait, did I say I like that about him? Well, I lied. I don't. I actually hate it. Cause for some reason Arthit very much still thinks of me as 'people' too. Someone he doesn't rely on for anything. There are even times when I will stand beside him, watching him struggle endlessly with something and not once will he even realize that I can be of any help. And no, before you guys get your panties in a twist, I absolutely do not pity him, but I would still like to feel needed at least at some point. Especially by the man I was currently dating. The man that it was high time I accept to myself that I was in love with.

Infact, probably the most annoying thing of all was that there were only three people I had actually seen him drop his guard with, Mrs. P, Erica, and in the most shocking turn of events, my own mother.

Speaking of mum, I snatched my gaze away from his face, something I have been finding harder and harder to do lately, as I looked around our farmhouse amongst the throngs of guests to search for my birth giver. And just like everything else in my life recently, I'm conflicted about being annoyed at being dragged to yet another party my mom was so fond of throwing for the world, or me grinning like an idiot at having Arthit agree to accompany me to a very public event officially as my date. Now if only I can manage to convince him to hop on a horse with me that one of my dad's Australian business partner insisted on gifting him, I would end the day on a high note.

Cause you see my mother dearest had set a rather firm rule in exchange of helping me wine and dine Arthit, and that was absolutely no physical contact beyond what I wouldn't do inside of a crowded church. Turns out along with Arthit I had to convince my own mother that I wasn't playing around with him like a creeper who had some sort of sick blind fetish. No seriously, is that even a thing?

But to be fair, even though it took every last ounce of my will power to not jump his bones every time he looked particularly adorable, which honestly was all the freaking time, I think this forced physical distance between us might actually be a good thing. I wanted Arthit to trust me, completely, wholeheartedly, without a shadow of a doubt, knowing that whenever he needed me I would be around. And even though he had already broken down so many barriers between us, explored things about himself, about us, in ways I had never thought possible there was still this invisible wall separating our relationship that somehow I just didn't know how to shatter. Like no matter how many dates we went on, how much time we spent together it was all just temporary. As if he already knew it would end someday. Perhaps that is why even as he sat amongst my entire family he hadn't ever even hinted at about his own. I swear if I didn't know for a fact that he was all flesh and blood I would have probably kept my vampire suspicions alive. Did the man seriously climb out from under a rock or something? How come other than his brother he never even spoke about the rest of the Rojnapats?