𝐞𝐮𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐚

12. tonight (i wish i was your boy)

matty

sitting at the doctors office waiting to know if my best friend, who also happens to be my fuck buddy, is pregnant or not is not what i'd like to be doing on my friday evening.

my leg is bouncing up and down due to my anxiety because what if she is pregnant? i can barely take care of myself, let alone a child.

i see val come out of the room with the doctor and i stand up, as well as george, adam, ross, rina and kat, and walk towards her.

i can't tell but her hands are shaking and she isn't looking at me. all i keep thinking is fuck. fuck fuck fuck.

"look at me, love." i say quietly.

she looks up at me and fuck.

"i'm pregnant, matthew."

it felt like the whole world stops once she says that. how the fuck am i supposed to feel? happy? mad? sad?

i run my hand through my hair out of frustration and look at george who has a smile on his face. i hear val cry though i don't know if it's out of happiness or sadness, and fuck, i feel like i could cry too. i don't though.

i wrap my arms around her and hug her tightly, kissing the top of her head. i can feel everyone looking at us right now and i'm not sure how to feel about it.

"we're gonna be fucking parents." i mumble into her hair. "we can do this. we'll get through this together." i say this but i don't even know if i can believe myself.

she looks up at me with her watery eyes and a big smile on her lips. she nods her head and then unexpectedly gives me a kiss on my lips.

everyone comes and hugs us and i know val is feeling very happy and loved just by the look on her face, but i'm still anxious about everything, though i make sure it isn't visible.

"fucking hell, mate, you're a dad." george comes up to me and hugs me.

"yeah." i chuckle.

"so, are you two together now?" he says quietly and i shake my head.

"i mean, we fucking act like we are. i was going to wait until i got my shit together but i guess we have to be together now, right?" i say.

"not necessarily." he says. "you could just be co parents or whatever that shit is about."

"good advice." i say sarcastically and roll my eyes. "but clearly we want to be together for reasons that do not include infants."

"then tell her."

"right now?"

i look over at her and she looks so happy while hugging her friends. she sees me looking at her and smiles even more causing me to smile too.

"i should tell her." i say quietly.

george drives us to vals house and drops her and i off. the whole time we can't keep our hands off each other but i'm not complaining at all.

she opens the door and the first thing i do is go to the kitchen and grab a bottle of red wine. i sit on the couch and wait for her to come back as she changes her clothes.