YOUR HEART KNOWS IT

PART 51: Daphne Part 3

A yawn left my mouth as I carefully open my eyes stretching my body on my side of the bed. I got up to push the curtains to the side to welcome the sun that shone brightly through the window. Ahhh! This is the dream, I thought to myself as I stretch my body more.
The neighbor's dogs keep on barking since God knows when but I hate to ruin the mood. Today will be a good day just like yesterday. My friends don't know it yet but we finally tied the knot, just the two of us. Things escalated quickly I know, three days ago he was just outside of the house begging for a chance but what can I say with Justin everything feels complete to me.

I was going to check the time on the wall clock but noticed that it stopped working so I opted to grab my phone but could not find it anywhere. I grabbed Justin's phone instead but something else on the screen caught my attention.
'I hate the fact that you are with her'
'I miss you
'I want to see you so bad' the text reads.

My hand instantly covered my mouth. The bitter taste of bile went up to my throat that I threw up as soon as I reach the toilet.
I feel empty. Numb. Stupid?
I can't help but pity myself while looking at my reflection in the mirror. Idiot! I lift my hand where my gold wedding ring is sparkling and tears start to form in the corner of my eye but just at that moment, my now-husband entered the room with a tray in his hand "Breakfast in bed" he cheerfully said.
I turn around fixing my gaze at him while he placed the tray carefully on the bed. I want to wipe that smile off his face! Scumbag!
"Is something wrong?" He asked as he peers into my eyes. I faltered for a moment "no, nothing" I said shaking the thoughts in my head. What should I tell my friends now?

The honk from a car made me startled I had to take a look around to check my reality before peeking at the window and surely speaking of my friends David's red Chevy Traverse is already parked outside. I let out a sigh before opening the door putting the smile back on my face.

Maybe my conscience is eating me.
I feel like shit whenever I see my friends especially now that I'm pregnant again. I'm sure both of them don't understand why I can't just leave Justin and it's making me regret why I kept it a secret from them.
This was all his fault. Idiot! Don't kid yourself. Of course, it was partly his fault but the decision was mine. I chose to be a victim I was the one who made that choice over and over again that now I am afraid, afraid to admit that I was wrong and they were right but the real question is Can I live without him?

"You can sit in the front, Cynthia's gonna take care of the kids in the back," David said while helping me put my things in the trunk.
"Okay, I feel bad for making you do this"
"Oh please hun, don't worry about it" Cynthia answered. David gave me the 'she said it already this is nothing' kind of gesture. I gave them my best smile but deep inside I'm really ashamed that they always have to take care of me. He got into the driver's seat and I was about to get settled in when something caught my eye in the side view mirror.

"Wait," I said,
"Good for him to show up," David said scarcely definitely seeing what I am seeing. I opened the door of the car to get out in a hurry that I forgot they came all the way here for me. I took a few steps back realizing what I just did and through the window, I said,
" I'm sorry just a moment please"
"The son of a-- "
"David!" Cynthia snapped fixing her gaze at my friend pointing out that the kids are also in the car.
"Thank you" I mouthed to her and she gave me the go signal. As I make my way to him I felt sorry for the nth time knowing that David is getting an ear from Cynthia in there.

We made eye contact and as always the fool me ran the distance between us and hugged him like a madwoman.

"Got your message," he said, here I am again forgetting everything I prepared to say when he'll show up. We stayed like that for a while when it hit me "Damn! Wait I--", I head back to the car finding the Driver's seat empty.

" Where's D--" was what I was about to say when I saw the trunk of the car lift.

" I guess change of plans?" David asked pulling my bags out with the look of don't tell me you're gonna bring that junk with you. I look at Justin back to David then to Justin back to David again

"I'm sorry" was all I could say. He didn't say a word and I understand.

"I'll see you later," I told Cynthia and waved goodbye to the kids.

"See you later hun," she said.

I watch as the car speed away then returned my gaze to Justin who was giving me that penitent stare again. The look I get to fall every time this happens, the face of feeling sorry but I wonder if he's sorry at all, those eyes that make me stupid for welcoming him with open arms every fucking time. I wonder who he was with believe me I wanted to ask where he was, I wanted to but...

"We should go inside first, it will take a while for me to get ready" a nod was all I could do as I follow him behind. I'm a martyr I know, I knew it for a long time.