The Dreamer

Chapter 35

"This one is pretty," Ali commented while coming out of the bedroom.

Sarah stood in the kitchen, examining the place. "I don't know. Let's keep looking."

Ali shrugged. "We are looking for a place for you after all, not for me. I might actually move here, you know. That lovely child of mine sometimes drives me crazy," she chuckled.

They left the empty apartment behind and drove few miles toward the next destination. Sarah started running out of money already and she felt it was best to start looking for a new place before she had to be kicked out of her current condo.

Ali noticed Sarah's concern as she drove. "Honey, don't worry. We will find a new place. Worse case scenario, you can stay with me," she grinned.

Sarah remained serious. "I am just frustrated. I have never been so uncertain in my life."

"And that is normal," Ali replied. "Change brings uncertainty. Welcome it."

Sarah's phone beeped. She grabbed it and looked at the screen quickly, before putting it back in the holder.

"Has she replied?" Ali asked.

Sarah shook her head. "She probably is pissed at Matthew too. I shouldn't have texted."

"You literally only offered your support, totally harmless. You did go, and she is almost an adult. Allow her to find that inner voice on her own. It will either direct her to unconditional love or to some more lessons, ultimately all paths lead to love eventually."

"You wise woman," Sarah smiled. "That was Damon by the way."

"I guessed," Ali shrugged.

"How?" Sarah turned to face her.

"I am psychic," Ali said while tapping her forehead. "Or it could be because he has been texting you no stop."

"He has. He wants to see me. I need to answer his question."

"What have you decided?"

"Nothing yet. But he is important to me and I need to make up my mind." She kept driving, gaze in the horizon, mind in the future.

That afternoon, Sarah dropped Ali off after unsuccessfully looking for a cheaper place she could feel satisfied with. She called Damon and invited him for a cup of coffee. She sent the address of a coffee shop she visited now and then, especially for their blueberry muffins. Damon agreed to see her at seven.

He arrived few minutes after seven, wearing one of his tight polo shirts and skinny jeans. His hair was as always, well taken care of. He approached the table with a smile and sat across her. Sarah hadn't put too much effort on looking her best. In one hand, she was so comfortable with him, it didn't matter what she wore. Yet in another hand, she wanted to be seen and appreciated. But that's not why she was here.

"So, hi," he smiled. "How is Jessica? Have you been able to talk to her?"

"No," she shook her head. "I needed to talk with you, about..." she took a sip of the tea she had ordered.

"About my proposal?"

She nodded. "Damon. Look, I, I don't know where to start," she sighed.

"Oh no," he put his hands on his face.

"No, don't say that. You are a very important person to me, and your friendship is valuable."

"But nothing more than my friendship, I assume? It's my fault. I should have come sooner."

"Damon, don't do this. Nothing is your fault. You offered all you could," she said.

"But it wasn't enough," he said defeated. "I tried to move on, by rebounding, I tried to ignore you, I did this myself."

"No, you didn't," Sarah said. "I failed too. I wanted you to believe I me. I was desperate because I needed to believe in myself and I didn't. I put too much pressure on you, too much expectation. Now I believe in myself. If you have stayed in my life, now I would not believe in myself because someone else does, and that is enough. So thank you Damon." She was quiet for few seconds. That had come out of nowhere. He also was quiet. They looked into each others' eyes.

"Thank you Sarah," he said at last. "I am still here. I will always be a friend for you."

She held back tears, not for the situation, but for the unexpected words that just came out of her mouth. "Thank you, Damon. Thank you."

He nodded. "I should go." He stood up.

"We could share a cup of coffee," she suggested.

"Just not now," he replied as he smiled softly and walked away.

She sat there alone, feeling a sense of sadness, but an overwhelming strength at the same time.