Fighting the Disquiet

4

"Sometimes life has a cruel sense of humor, giving you the thing you always wanted at the worst time possible."
― Lisa Kleypas

When I'm finished eating I stand up and throw away my trash in a nearby trashcan. I check the time on my phone and realize that I need to go to my locker to change out my books before the next class. I don't want to interrupt the conversation at the table but I feel like leaving without saying anything would be really rude.

Decker notices me standing and asks, "Are you heading to class?"

"I need to go to my locker first," I say putting my backpack on that feels like it's going to break my back.

"Cool me too, I'll follow you," he says standing up.

I groan internally as he announces to the table that we're gonna head out and watch as he throws his trash away.

"Ready?" He asks looking at me.

I nod and make my way towards the building where my locker is. Unlike my school in Indio this school is really spread out. And has a building for each subject basically. When I enter the building I pull up my notes app so that I can recall my locker combo, still not having memorized it and I cringe in embarrassment as Decker watches me struggle to open it.

"You want help?" He asks, smiling like he's trying not to laugh.

I sigh before nodding and telling him my combination. He opens it in a matter of seconds and I stare daggers at the back of his head. He steps to the side, leaning against the locker next to mine while I swap out my textbooks. Luckily I only need one since Painting is my last class of the day. I can feel him watching me and it's making me uncomfortable so I move faster.

I slam my locker shut and lock it before turning and waiting for him to lead the way to his locker.

He smiles and turns around motioning with his head for me to follow him.

"So, you're like really shy," he suddenly speaks after we've been walking in silence for a couple of minutes.

I shrug, not really sure what to say to that. He's a pretty blunt person and doesn't seem to have a filter.

"Well I'm not gonna like bite or anything," he chuckles looking down at me due to our height difference.

I nodded, half-smiling at his joke so that he doesn't think I'm like afraid of him or something. He suddenly stops walking and turns to what I'm assuming is his locker. I wait a couple feet away for him to finish before he turns and points.

I give him a confused expression not seeing anything in the halls worth pointing at considering we are like one of the only ones in the building.

"That's our classroom," he says, motioning for me to follow him inside.

I take a seat at my usual spot and of course he does the same. Sitting directly across from me. I glance at the clock on the wall just as the bell rings. I pray that people enter the classroom soon so we're not in here alone for very long. I can see him lean forward so he's resting his elbows on his knees and is facing me. It makes my heart start to beat a little faster with nerves that he's just sitting there staring at me. And sitting so closely. God, El get it together. He's just a boy.

"So, did you grow up in Indio?" He suddenly asks.

I turn my head as a student enters the classroom and slumps down in a seat towards the back.

I nod in response to him.

"It must be weird living so close to the beach now then?"

I shrug. It's not like I'd never stayed with my dad before. I had to go to his house once a month when I was little and then I would spend holidays with him as well.

"Do you like the beach?"

Oh my gosh, this guy really is annoying.

"It's alright," I say pulling out my pencil case.

"I guess since I'm a swimmer I just love the water. I couldn't imagine living in the desert," he says.

I nod awkwardly, again not really sure how to respond to his comment.

"What are you doing after school?" He asks which surprises me.

"Homework," I say. What else would I be doing on a Monday night?

"You should come hang out with us. We have a tradition that on the first day of school we all go out and get fro-yo."

"I dunno," I say scrunching my nose.

"Come on, it's going to be fun," he persuades.

"I'll think about it," I finally reply.

Obviously, I'm not going to go because as I said I don't want to waste my time getting to know people who will probably just screw me over, but I don't want to be rude.

"Well give me your number so I can text you and if you change your mind you can call me after school," he says pulling out his phone.

I don't want to give this stranger, a boy, my phone number. But he's being really stubborn. I could just give him a wrong number but then he'd know when I don't immediately get his text.

I finally speak up, giving it to him, but not too loudly on account of the multiple other people now sitting in the classroom.

I swipe open his text and read it.

It's Decker. We're meeting at the tennis courts after school. Text me if you change your mind. :)

I nod at him, letting him know I got it, and lock my phone slipping it into my bag just as the teacher walks in, and the tardy bell rings. Throughout the lecture, which I'm taking notes on, I can feel Decker's eyes on me. It makes me nervous but mostly annoyed that he can't take a hint, but I try to just focus on the lesson. When the block is finally over Decker asks me if I need help finding my next class.

"No, thanks," I smile politely before exiting and heading in the direction that I hoped my class was in.

As I was staring at the map on my phone, relieved to indeed be going the right way, another text popped up on my phone. I didn't recognize the number so I opened it.

Hey! It's Summer! Decker gave me your number. You totally have to come to fro-yo after school! If you don't I'll be so sad.

I grumbled to myself as I entered the art studio and took a seat at one of the empty easels. I dropped my bag by my feet and contemplated what to type in response. I felt really bad about lying and saying I couldn't go. Technically I don't have anything to do after school and my curfew is 10 pm on school nights. But it was making me nervous how much of an interest they were taking in me. ME, like the loserist loser ever. Especially Decker. Like, why is he being so friendly?

So I typed up a response apologizing and letting her know that I needed to be home but maybe next time. Her reply pops up immediately with the crying emoji. I sigh and drop my phone in my bag as I wait for class to start.