Draft version - Russian Roulette - Family secrets

Ch. 84: What's on your mind?

"You're far, far away, pretty boy." Mackenzie tried to get Gareth's attention.

As usual they had met for lunch, Gareth had been absentminded and thoughtful the entire time. Normally he would put aside everything else when they met. She knew he was busy and there were a lot of things on his plate to deal with, but that day he had not been able to push whatever he was thinking about away.

"Sorry, malyshka. I had a business meeting yesterday, that's why I came home late. It didn't go exactly as planned and I have a lot to think about."

Enthusiastically he shoveled up a forkful of the delicious Greek what-ever-it-was and chewed it to prove he was there with her. It felt like sand in his mouth and swallowing it felt even worse. It was unfair to the effort gone into preparing his meal, unfair to Mackenzie who had spent time ordering it and bringing it to him, he just had no appetite.

The meeting with Grychenko had him wired.

After his meeting with Grychenko he had dismissed his men, though they had been eagerly awaiting a report, and certainly not been pleased with his silence. He had handed the recording devices to Cracker for him to pass on to Horse and simply left them all.

Gareth had needed time to process alone with his whiskey.

"Can I ask you something?" Gareth was not sure how to present it without having to go into too many details he would rather Mackenzie did not know about. On the other hand, he wanted her opinion because he valued it and her way of thinking.

"Of course."

With a smile Mackenzie put down her utensils and gave him her full attention.

"Have you ever had somebody you thought you knew who and what was. Their actions and stories about them confirmed what you knew even the rumors, which should not be taken into consideration, spoke in addition to what you knew." Gareth huffed lightly. "And then when you met them, they turned out to be completely different and everything you thought you knew left you puzzled and feeling bad?"

"Maybe not entirely like that. But I have met a few people who had presented themselves to be one way but later turned out to be completely different once I got to know them. You included."

Gareth sent her a soft smile.

"I understand what you're saying, and I appreciate it. But I mean somebody you genuinely believed to be a despicable person and then you found yourself sympathizing and questioning if you were right in the first place and who they showed you was just a façade or it was the other way around."
"I've not tried that. Not in the way you describe it." Mackenzie thought about it. She was not really sure what Gareth wanted to know, it seemed important to him so she would give him an honest answer and share what she thought.

"Take my father for instance. I know him to be a loving man. Gentle and caring. Intelligent and deep down a good person. What other people know him as will probably be at the opposite end of the scale. They see him as cold, ruthless and domineering. If they knew who he was when not working those two personas would meet in the middle and give a more well-rounded picture of him. Does that make sense?"
"It does actually. I'm just having a really hard time with this one. I'm usually right when accessing a person. But this time I could be way off."

With a little sigh Mackenzie grabbed Gareth's hand and gave it a squeeze. She had never seen him question himself like that before. He had doubts from time to time, this had a different feel to it. It had shaken him to the core.

"Go with your gut. You've survived on that all your life. I don't think it'll fail you this time. If you have a little nagging voice telling you something is up, then that voice is probably right."
"Thank you, malyshka. You're right. I'll do that." Gently he took her hand she already had in his and pulled it to his mouth and kissed it.