"Gong gong!" Went the sugar bear church bell on Christlemas.
"Ooh baby bell I love it when you dong!" I shout as I spit on the bell.
"Oi chickling get down from there and stop seducing the bell!" The priest screams and christens me in wetsuit salty shavings.
"Oh baby priest! You look so good in those uggs!" I scream and I pull them off 😏
"Oh darling dolly don't rip my uggs!" He screams and gives me coal toothpaste that makes my teeth orange. Then I find Craig David licking my shovel that I was using for digging my new troll cave.
"No baby Craig! Lick my cheeks instead" I smirk as he leans in to my face.
"No babe, not those cheeks" I say as I slide my size xs thong down my legs revealing a sequin.
"Oh I know what you mean." He smiles and breaks his neck on my spanner.
"Wait Craig before you snap your neck we need to do something together." I say.
"What is it putrid plum?" He asks as his neck dangles off his iron body.
"We must put a thong on the gong." I smirk as I take a jumbo jet up to the clock tower and Craig David holds onto my mountain boots. Then I reach into my backpack and slowly slip out a child.
"Oops wrong thing!" I say as I chuck the child off the tower. Then I reach back in and pull out a golden thong. Me and Craig hold hands as we strap the thong on the church bell.
"Oh no baby there is not much room up here!" I say and I kick him off. Now it was just me and Justin. Then I got pregnant from the bell and Justing snogged me and I had an abortion.
