Broken Beauty

𝙀 𝙞 𝙜 𝙝 𝙩

Today I woke up and the house like normal was dead silent. It was the day after the whole fiasco went down. Today I'm looking forward to the long talk about what happened yesterday, not.

So instead of facing whatever the world had planned for me that morning, I stayed in bed. It was quiet and peaceful it felt like the world wasn't weighing on my shoulders for one second, all my pain was gone in a sheer moment. Except that the pain doesn't go away, ever. It will lessen a little sometimes and once in a while, it will come back in a big tidal wave. I think as the year's pass, the tidal waves become farther apart. Unlike, in the beginning, it's a constant tsunami.

It's not the beginning but it still feels like a giant and all-consuming tsunami. They say you don't become wise with years but with trauma, well I'm must be like 500 years old by now.

Sometimes I wish I wasn't so wise and still looked at the world in a rainbow of colors but it feels as though my rainbow is black and grey.

As I forced myself out of my painful thoughts I got out of bed trying not to make any creaks on the cold wooden floor. I trudged into the bathroom to take my pills and untangle the lion mane.

After I did my morning room I finally opened my door ready to face my biological family. What I didn't expect was when walking into the kitchen getting plate of food thrown at me. Though thank god I didn't embarrass myself when I dodged it and sat at the dining table as if nothing happened.

When I sat down all chatter and talking ceased. Funny how it ceased when I sat down but not when food was literally thrown at my face.

As food was placed in front of me I finally looked up into the Icy blue eyes of my eldest brother. His eyes were cold and held so many memories that I'm not apart of they seemed to be searching mine but like brother like sister mine were just as blocked off and cold.

He looked at me for a little while longer before I raised an eyebrow at him. Than all emotion seemed to be gone and replaced by anger

"Now what the hell did you think you were doing last night. You blew my deal with my allies and cost me a property of ours to make it up to them. Do you not get that childish actions such as yours will not be tolerated. I don't need to repeat myself constantly it should go in one ear and stay in your thick head. Understood?" Let's give a round of applause for the drama queen over there.

The funny thing is he automatically thought it was something I did and didn't even ask if I was ok. Though, is see past his little facade he's trying to get respect from me and for me to trust him. Well, respect and trust are earned not given.

"Yes sir" Oh shit. All my brother's head snapped over to me.

"What did you just call me" uh oh. "U-um sir you know being formal and all." Did I just stutter? Yes dumbass

"Don't ever call me that Astraea, no need for formalities" Did he just? really he wants me to believe him with no formalities when he is in a suit and talks so properly all the time.

"Ok" "Also you will start school tomorrow and I already ordered everything for you no need to worry. You may be excused after you eat at least half your plate since it seems you don't have much of an appetite" I just nodded my head and tried to zone out of their conversations.

You know I wish that someone would finally realize the hurricane of sadness in my eyes. The blankness that if you look close enough you'll see an overflowing dam. Then maybe just maybe people will see im not just an ice queen im a teenager who has seen way too much and too little at the same time.

I found myself staring into space most of the breakfast unknowingly attracting a certain pair of blue eyes to look at me from time to time wondering why I looked so lost and blank at the same time.

As time went throughout the day and day turned into night, my brothers had invited me to a family movie night but I wasn't fairly in the mood. So I just played watched TikTok, listened to music, and went on Pinterest.

It felt like my life was a cycle at times, wake up, eat, sleep, repeat the same three apps, and wallow in self-pity. As I finally did my night routine I picked out my outfit for tomorrow.

Maybe the school would be better and I would make new friends. That's all I want is some balance and positivity in my life.

Though I can't express how much I hate school and all the people that are in it I really need new people in my life. Although I love being alone my old school counselor would say, friends, bring just a little sprinkle of life into your world.

Maybe she's wrong, most likely, but at least I have music, art, and reading (Wattpad) if friends don't work out.

As I closed my eyes that night I didn't realize that I was so caught up in my thought I forgot to take my sleeping pill.

I hadn't even realized the crazy night and eventful day I would have the next day...

Authors Note!!!!

So this chapter was a filler/POV of Astraeas thought and the way she feels about life and really what she feels deeply on the inside. Showing she isn't only the tuff and cold bitch she portrays herself as. I hope you like it and get ready for some drama next chapter my lovesssss💙

Also, I will be updating their character aesthetics and making my book look more aesthetically pleasing throughout the week so expect some changes, not to the actual writing though