Access Denied [J. JK FF : Completed✔]

63. Individuals

Gulping, I look down at the ring while he sits next to me and observes me. Overwhelmed would be an underestimation for what was going on in my head and now I wish Jungkook would have kept some extra wine because I think I need to gulp some feelings down for now. So many thoughts racing through my head, that I can't concentrate on this man who is trying to comfort me with his words.

Words that he doesn't know that I can't hear, because they're being drowned out by the screaming thoughts I have running inside my head.

Like a blackhole, all those screaming thoughts of my head disappear in a swirl when I see fingers click infront of my eyes. Blinking into reality, I look at Jungkook who now has a confused but worried expression.

"Everything okay? What world did you get lost in?" He asks in a soft voice.

I gulp my anxiety down and shake my head. "Its nothing, I'm alright." I said but it was clear that I wasn't because he didn't buy it.

"Tell me, I know you're thinking about something. And don't shake your head or shrug, I know it's something." He lays down those facts firmly.

Sighing at his stubbornness, I look at him, hoping I can see a hint of denial of his words. There were none, for your information.

Feeling his arms hold me by my side, he makes me turn to face him and holds my hand.

"I'm....scared."

There I said it. But, his expression clearly asked for explanations and elaborations.

"Its scary how fast things are changing. I'm scared that-"

Breathe.

"-that yesterday we were ready to kill each other because we were lead to it, I'm scared that things can't be fixed anymore, I'm scared I'll mess us up. Everything is happening so fast, I can't wrap my head around it. I spent years trying to find out what exactly happened to my mother. Now, we get to know that our parents were killed together, for a game- a game we became pawns to. I'm scared I'll make a reckless decision and everything will fall apart."

"You're thinking too much baby, calm down-"

"No, just see for instance. I- I revealed something so important without a thought. I told you my real name...I don't regret telling you my name Jungkook but- had it not been you- think about it. It's a mess. This is all on me. I took the mission, I started all this- I got us to this-"

Jungkook is quick to seal my lips with his to stop me from spiralling any futher and he stays like that, just for now. My breath was caught in my throat. Instead of moving away, I feel him push my face onto his chest and take me into a warm hug.

"Its okay to be scared the future, it's how we stay cautious and alarmed of our surroundings. You and I are not normal everyday people with ordinary jobs and we have to be extra careful but it doesn't mean we let it take over our lives baby. I can't assure you of what will happen and how things will go down with your psycho boss but I'll protect you as much as I can."

Pulling away, he stares at me with his hands cupping my face, "and you didn't start this. If anything, you were pulled into this game. It was all a plan, don't you see the pattern? Two people who died while negotiating, though to have shot each other- their children killing each other as well? It's a perfect way to frame us into two individuals bitter from their parents' death while your boss gets the machine into his hands after getting you to do all the work for him already.