62. Intoxicated

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Jungkook's eyes stare at me with confusion. Of course, the alcohol had clouded his senses.

After staring at me and then back at his ring, he finally had a look of realisation, with a glimmer of hope.

"This was a mission. A mission where I was supposed to take away and destroy a threat to the world. I wasn't supposed to fall in love with you Jungkook, I never was."

And here come the water works. I pause to take a deep threat as his eyes show fear. Fear of facing reality.

"Except, I did. I did fall in love with you. I don't know how, when and where, all I know is that I did. I came from a place where I wasn't used to a lot of love from strangers. But you showed me love, without even knowing me. How could I not love that? I knew this day of revelation would come, I didn't know it would be like this, but it's why I made you promise me. That you'll know that I loved you- still love you, no matter what.So no, I didn't lie." 

Under the moonlight, I see his eyes shine with water works of their own while a slight smile of hope proudly makes it's way onto his beautiful face. And in that moment, I make a reckless decision.

Just like he was intoxicated with alcohol, his now smile seemed to have intoxicated me, for what I was going to pull off, I knew I'd overthink in the morning and curse myself. So I took a second deep breath and was ready to execute my poorly thought of decision.

"You, Jeon Jungkook, have made Kim Haewon fall in love with you."

And....the reality sinks in. I gave away the biggest secret of my existence. My real identity.

And Jungkook knew how big of a deal this was, even when under the impression of alcohol because his eyes went wide. I bite back the unintentional sobs that come with how overwhelming the feeling is. Someone other than Jin and my last boss knows my name.

"You- You just- your name-" As he fumbles in shock, all I can do is nod hesitantly and hope that he would keep it to himself. I'm sure he knows the value of things like this because if word gets out, there is a 98% chance that I'd either end up dead in a dark alley or never be found again.

Jungkook looked like his whole existence was full of butterflies. And with little awareness, I'm suddenly pulled forward, stumbling onto him. Just in the moment when I looked up, it felt like the world around me had crashed and disappeared.

Like nothing mattered, like nothing else existed, like everything that mattered was just us- and all this because, he had his lips on me. I know it sounds like an exaggeration, but the fact that he had chosen to kiss me, relieved me. It made me feel like he didn't despise me, that I wasn't the worst person he had known in his life anymore. It made me feel safe, accepted and it eased the guilt and pain that was tormenting me.

It was like the medicine we needed. The exact cure to this turmoil that was eating us alive, feeding on our traumas and fears.

The world finally stopped spinning when he pulled away for a brief moment and we looked at each other with smiles while we both had a tiny streams of tears flowing from our eyes, down to our jaws.

"Your kiss sobers me up. Its sobering and yet still so intoxicating, especially after all these days." He admits.

Guilt once again arises in my heart, and I can't help but bring those memories up.

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to hurt you- I didn't mean anything hurtful that I said to you. I didn't want to betray you, I just...." my sentence trails off as Jungkook places his hand on my cheek.

"....was following orders. I know. I'm sorry too, I didn't mean any hurtful of hateful things I said. I love you, and I was just so- so angry. Angry that the perfect dream of mine was shattered. I would have never been able to forgive myself if my bullet hit you." Jungkook breathes, struggling to even think about the shoot off.

"Well it's a good thing that I'm good at what I do, isn't it?" I force a laugh, trying to over come the memory flashing in my head once again.

He nods before whispering, "Come with me."

Holding my hand, he leads me to his room, empty wine bottle on the floor and things scattered around like they were thrown in an anger fit, decorate it.

Jungkook runs towards a particular drawer and picks something out before coming back to me. Moving me back to sit on his bed, he sits on both knees and takes my hand.

"This I believe, belongs to you."

And with that, he pushes the promise ring back onto my finger.

"I'm sorry I took it off of you while you were unconscious. It was a petty thing to do but given the circumstances, I was extremely hurt and went crazy until tonight. And just like the ring is back in its place, I promise everything will go back to normal as well." His words had a later of comfort wrapped around them, like a warm blanket around you on a cold night.

This was Jungkook's magic. Everytime he would speak with soft words, they gave you this fuzzy feeling inside that made you explode with happiness.

_________________________________________

IM ALIVE I PROMISE-

4am and I have a surprise I promise.

- Sarisha💕

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