Bokuto frowned, feeling around his bed. "Kashi… babe where'd you go?"
No noise at all met his ears.
Bokuto got up, nervous. "Keiji! Where'd you go?" Akaashi popped his head in the door and frowned. He pointed to his phone. Bokuto pouted. "Babe come back to bed. It's like three in the morning…"
"Shhhh."
Bokuto turned back around and laid down. Akaashi came back a few minutes later and climbed into bed. He kissed Bokuto's forehead and put his back against Bokuto's chest.
"Please don't interrupt me when I'm talking."
Bokuto tensed for a second before humming. "Sorry."
"It's okay. Just get some sleep."
Bokuto snuggled into Akaashi, smiling. He smelled like flowers today. "Love you."
"I love you too." Akaashi turned and kissed him.
Bokuto smiled. "You're so cute."
Akaashi hushed him, gentler this time. "It's time to go to sleep."
Bokuto nodded. He burrowed his face into Akaashi's hair, calming down. "Good night."
"Night." Akaashi whispered.
****
Bokuto sighed, sitting on the couch. By himself. Again. Akaashi had to take another phone call and had shushed him.
Bokuto didn't really like being shushed either so it didn't set well with him. Akaashi knew.
Akaashi knew why he couldn't be told to hush.
He knew the reason it made him upset.
But yet for the past month he'd been told non-stop to hush or be quiet. It made him so ungodly upset but he didn't want to tell Akaashi to be kinder.
It made him nervous correcting his partner's actions.
It always had since well… her.
But he didn't like thinking about that.
Akaashi walked back in and walked past Bokuto, to the bathroom. Bokuto scratched the back of his head. "You okay Keiji?"
"Fine Koutarou."
Bokuto nodded. He still felt uneasy.
Akaashi came out of the bathroom and sat on the couch, getting a blanket from the basket next to it. He sat in Bokuto's lap and hugged him around his neck. He kissed the side of his head. "What's wrong?"
"Not much." Bokuto smiled. He kissed Akaashi's forehead.
"Mm… okay." Akaashi grabbed the remote and handed it to Bokuto. "You choose."
Was he being bribed to be quiet? Bokuto pushed the thought away. He was just right for Akaashi. No need to think like that.
He picked a show and leaned back. He held Akaashi carefully, gentle. Akaashi huffed slightly, furrowing his brows.
"What's wrong?"
"My head just hurts a little. That's all. It's okay, shhhh."
Bokuto nodded. He felt another twinge. "You need something?"
"No. But thank you."
Bokuto nodded again, silent. He didn't dare utter another word.
****
Akaashi yawned, getting up. "Bye Koutarou."
"Ah. Bye bye Keiji." Bokuto hugged him. "Love you!"
"Oh, oh lower your voice."
"S-sorry." Bokuto chuckled nervously. He dropped his voice to a whisper. "Love you Keiji."
"I love you too." Akaashi kissed the bridge of his nose and then his lips. "I'll be back in a few hours. Okay?"
Bokuto nodded. "Got it."
Akaashi walked out of the house and immediately Bokuto plopped on the floor, grabbing his hair and pulling.
"He isn't her. He isn't her. He isn't her. Don't freak out Koutarou." Bokuto took a deep breath.
Why was Akaashi acting like her though?
Why was Akaashi hurting him?
Bokuto whined. "A-Akaashi loves me. Akaashi loves me, come on. He wouldn't do that." He took a deep breath. "Akaashi loves me. Right."
It didn't feel right.
Akaashi wasn't acting lovey anymore.
Akaashi was turning into her.
Bokuto stiffened. "I love Akaashi... But he doesn't love me that much anymore… does he? Do I have to do that thing again… I did it for her. She was happy."
He sighed.
"Yeah I might… it's wrong but I need it."
****
Akaashi walked into his house, a palm on his head to try and ease away his headache. "Koutarou… do we have any medicine for headaches?"
"M-mhmm in the bathroom."
Akaashi stopped walking and turned to the kitchen. A sniffle sounded. He hurried into the kitchen and crouched down. "Woah,woah deep breaths. What happened?"
"I-I just…" Bokuto looked up. "I want... To… be good for you."
"Ko… you're perfect for me. What do you mean?" He held his face. "What happened?"
"I-I can't eat... Again. I threw up earlier to feel better but I can't eat now and I just…"
"Koutarou… you don't… you don't need to do that anymore. I'm not her. I won't make you do that for my amusement. I love you…"
"But… Kashi you act like her. I don't know why."
"What?"
"You won't stop telling me to be quiet and it makes me really upset. I can't help being talkative and loud. It's just a part of me. But you keep telling me to hush. She wouldn't let me talk. At all. And now you're doing it."
Akaashi's heart broke as Bokuto sobbed.
"I just want to be good. I want to be a good boyfriend."
Akaashi wrapped around Bokuto and hugged him tight, worried. "Baby… no…"
Bokuto held on, shaky.
"I love you. I love you so much. Don't forget that." Akaashi kissed his cheek firmly. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry oh my God… I hadn't realized."
"B-but why did you tell me to hush?"
"I've been having a lot of headaches. Noise makes them worse. That's all. The phone calls are from work and someone I'm talking to to get something."
"Something?" Bokuto mumbled. "What?"
"Ah it was gonna be a surprise." Akaashi pulled out his phone and showed him a picture of a fluffy white dog. "He reminded me of you and I just knew you would love him."
"Aw…" Bokuto laughed. "He's so cute."
"He is, isn't he? Now, deep breaths." Akaashi kissed his forehead. "Let's get some food into you, okay?"
"I can try…"
Akaashi nodded. "I'm sorry…"
"Not your fault. Instinct." Bokuto sighed.
Akaashi helped him up. "I get it." He kissed his cheek again. "I've got you."
"Mm."
Akaashi kissed his forehead. "I promise."
Bokuto hugged him. "I love you."
"I love you too. Now, food. Go sit down."
"Mkay." Bokuto sat down and put his chin in his hand, watching Akaashi. He hummed. Akaashi looked over and smiled warmly. Yeah. He loved Akaashi. That was okay and he was perfect for him. They were perfect for each other.
