TW: Mentions/depictions/description of a suicide attempt
Tendou stared at the water below him, admiring the sun glinting off of the river's surface. Tonight felt nice.
The sun wasn't annoyingly bright, and his back didn't hurt from sleeping weirdly. The same back that he'd wished so many times for there to be wings. So he could fly away and get away from his issues. So he could be different without it being scary.
He was special already, though. Just not in a way he enjoyed too much.
He knew of the whispers and where his bruises came. Tendou knew not many people welcomed him with open arms and wanted to give him the love he craved.
There was just one right now.
He would leave eventually, though.
Tendou sighed quietly and looked up from his spot on a rock near the river eyes took away from the small paradise.
In the daytime, the water wasn't so pretty. It didn't glitter with reds and pinks of the evening but looked brown and had flecks of the sun on its surface, making it shimmer. In the day, the river looked like his lover's eyes when he'd first seen them or when they took walks in the park when Tendou needed to get up and out of bed.
That was before he refused walks. Now, his lover's eyes turned more brown than gold with worry as he tried to get the redhead up and moving in the morning.
This river was his little paradise.
It looked like his eyes at night and Ushijima's in the daytime. It was another moment before he smiled.
Oh, precious Ushijima with his rare smiles and socially inept tendencies.
He hoped the other boy would find out the reason for that soon.
Tendou stood slowly, starting his tired walk to the bridge crossing his paradise. Cars passed with children in the backseat, their innocent eyes staring at the water that looked tainted with blood from the sun.
For a moment, Tendou wondered if there was someone's blood in this body of water.
The thought crossed his mind so fast that it startled him. There one second and gone the next.
He could be like that. He could leave everything behind and maybe come back as a child with parents who understood him and a group of friends who loved him; a caring partner who kissed his hands when they couldn't hold anything as he cried.
He could be gone.
Suddenly the world didn't seem so crowded; he wasn't scared. He felt alone.
Cars still passed, people still talked but, he was still, eyes locked on the water.
This river wasn't his paradise.
It was just a river. Lots of places had rivers. Tendou could disappear into this one; all of the issues Tendou had would be gone.
He'd learned how when someone fell into the water was a moment of peace; it wasn't so cold and scary.
He wanted that.
He wanted wings to be on his back so that when he jumped, be pulled down into the water faster; he wouldn't have to worry about flying away and facing anything that made him upset. It would be bliss.
He could fall.
They would call it an accident.
"Boy Falls While Sitting On Bridge: Tragedy Strikes His Loved Ones"
