𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐀𝐂𝐊 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐈𝐓𝐀𝐍 ◦ 𝐈𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬

𝐋𝐞𝐯𝐢 𝐀𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐧 || 𝐅𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭

𝐒𝐨𝐧𝐠: 𝐈'𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐆𝐨𝐨𝐝 ~ 𝐉𝐚𝐲𝐦𝐞𝐬 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐠

(Requested by _Camreon_) 

Warning: !SELF HARM!, Feels, Blood, Angst, 

(Also when I do timeskip in this one with the ***** it means another day or moment. It doesn't mean same day. I would write something to say it was same day. Anyway I hope you understand)

Words: 1.3k words

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Under every soldier there is a person with a heart so fragile, yet so cold and distant from others that you feel so frustrated. Angry with myself, feeling like I haven't done much at all. Growing up without family, dying at the hands of the titans long ago......I swore I will kill them so i would have a purpose in my life. 

Tears would flood streaming down violently, feeling numb in my own soul. I felt all alone, feeling like I have to make sure to do everything in my own accord. Damn this world, damn these titans, damn this war.

I press the blade ever so finely into my skin going down until I lift the bloody blade, seeing the blood seep through and roll down to my elbow dripping onto the bathroom floor. Every line i drew, more negative thoughts blinded me and the pain was unbearable until i started to become more numb to the pain.

"Ahh damn," i mutter under my shallow breathe, before making more cuts down my arm.

I then finally start washing the sink up along with the floor quickly, when my vision starts to fade a little when I regain consciousness again. Once I cleaned up I wash my arm so then I can bandaged it up, seeing the thick crimson red flow down into the drain. I then lean up the cabinet rummaging through the shelf, finding a bandage grasping it and heading to sit down to tie it up.

{TimeSkip}

********************

"Lieutenant (L/N), why are you so damn late?!" Erwin questions strictly, as I tense up.

"S-Sorry, you see I--"

"I don't want to hear your excuses, just go and train your damn cadets," he says bitterly, knowing we didn't have a good bond or relationship. 

"Yes Sir," I reply, walking away quickly before finding my cadets already started their training on the field. A tiny smile curls at the corner of my lips, as I began to teach my cadets.

{TimeSkip}

*******************

I walk down the hallway to the mess halls when I felt someone shove me into the wall, revealing one of the girls that hated me as well. She grabs me by the collar, "So you ready to own up to what happened the other day? When are you gonna admit everything is your fault?" She questions angrily.

"B-But it's not,"

She then grabs me by the throat, as I try gasping for air. I try to step up, but she slaps me harshly before pinching my cheeks. "It is, you can't always have Heichou looking after you," She sneers, as her nails dig into my cheek making me groan. 

"P-Please j-just drop it, you don't want your position to be screwed,"

"Ho-- Why--.......you better start realising that you are no one," She growls angrily, feeling her fingers leave my neck and cheeks as she walks off. After a while I stood there touching my cheek hissing in pain, as I felt light tears roll down.

{TimeSkip}

**************

"Dammit Lieutenant (L/N), get your damn head into the fight!!!" I hear Commander Erwin scowls at me, as I felt my body being slammed into the ground by another captain.

"Ahh," i hiss, feeling the dust envelope around us.

The dry hot sun beats down on us as I felt a large shade drift over me, "What's the matter with you, your being so up in the clouds," Erwin says, looking on me making me gulp.

"R-Right s-sir," 

{TimeSkip}

**************

It's been a few days since I have seen Levi and Erwin as I try to avoid anyone, as I began to cut myself again. My depression continues to hit me hard, tears streaming down my cheeks feeling like I was no one important to this regiment and this place I call home. I felt like I was some pawn, being used by your own commander and being thrown around by other girls.

**Knock**Knock**

"Shit," i hiss under my breathe, as blood drips down my arm. "W-Who is it?!"

"Levi, may I come in?"

"N-No, leave me alone!!!"

"Tch, I'm coming in brat," he says, as he walks in. I could hear his feet walking around in my bedroom, when I try to wash the blood away. That's when i felt a hand take my wrist, grabbing the knife so fast he knocks it away from me. "What the hell are you doing?!"

"........"

"Come on, let's get you to my office immediately," he says sternly, before taking my hand and heading to his office.

****

I sat on his bathroom bench as he grabs some alcohol and swabs, seeing him focusing hard finding the supplies as I sat there trying my best not to cry. "Alright I'm gonna be washing this, and it might sting," he says, with a more gentle voice.

"Hmm," i hum, as he takes my arm and began to clean my wounds. I began to whimper in pain, tightening my grip around his jacket. I was shaking violently, as he manages to finish cleaning the wound and wrapping it up with a bandage after.

After a while of silence he helps me down the bench when my face was very close to his, feeling my cheeks grow warm. I then quickly move out of the way, "T-Thank you, but I better be go--"

"You're not going anywhere, I have been meaning to talk to you,"

"W-Why, did I do something wrong sir?"

"Just call me Levi, and no....you didn't do anything wrong," he assures me, taking me over to his bed. We both sit down, "I wanted to ask are you alright?"

"E-everything is good,"

"It doesn't seem like it," he says, when he holds my scarred wrist. "What's this? What did I witness earlier? What's been going on?"

"N-Nothing,"

"Like hell it is nothing!" he snaps, making me flinch in response when he sighs deeply. "I'm sorry, but I have been seeing you and you haven't been eating as much and you have been training a lot more. What's been going on?"

I look up with tears threatening to spill, "I feel like I don't belong here, I feel like I'm only being used to Commander Erwin and no one appreciates me in the ward," I began, feeling my chest tighten. "I'm useless, and no matter what we do........our lives don't matter in the end."

"(Y/N)......."

"Huh?"

He shuffles closer to me and caresses my cheek gently looking into my eyes deeply, "You matter to me, I might be a stubborn old mule or un interested man.......but I do have a soft spot for you," He admits, as my breathe hitches in my throat. I then felt tears lightly roll down my cheeks, as I cover my mouth trying not to cry anymore when I felt arms wrap around me.

"T-Thank you, L-levi," i whimper, burying my head into his chest. 

"I will do anything in my power to make sure you belong with me," he whispers, pecking my temple lightly. "Because you will always be here, and I will always fight for you."

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A/N: I hope you all enjoyed this. I know it's a bit cliche but anyway I hope you all are safe and have a great day or night 

~ Little Bean