Pinn - Memories

Chapter 8

Piper's POV

My mouth is wide open. He likes me?

I start, 'But... but that doesn't make any sense. You told me you just like me as a friend!'

'That's what I thought at the time', Josh explains. 'But the truth is I didn't know what I was feeling. I've been surrounded by boys my entire life – my brother, all boys hockey games, and all boys schools. You were the first female friend I've had in my life. When we spent time with each other, I started getting nervous around you. I didn't know why because I'd never felt that before. In the back of my mind I started to think that maybe I have feelings for you but I wasn't sure, and when you told me you like me, I freaked out. I was caught off guard and didn't know what to say, so I just said that I saw you as a friend.'

I'm gobsmacked. 'But if you figured out you like me, then why did you never contact me?', I ask.

Josh's head droops to the ground. 'I never knew what to say.'

I get that. I never knew what to say either, after I ran off.

Josh continues, 'Once I knew for sure, it was too late. I was gone. Back to the country. I thought I was never going to see you again.'

I nod in understanding.

'So, what do you say?', He smiles and raises his eyebrows.

Wait. Is he asking me out?

I babble, 'I'm sorry, I... I like someone else now.'

I rush towards my bags, pick them up and hurry out of the studio.

Josh's POV

Piper's gone faster than I can comprehend what she said.

She doesn't like me. She's moved on.

I feel like such an idiot. I had a chance and I missed it.

I collapse in the middle of the studio, head in my hands, alone. I guess this is what it feels like to get your heart broken.

Piper's POV

I have no idea what to do. I'm sitting on the bus stop bench seat outside The Next Steep. There's still 10 minutes until my bus arrives.

I could go back and explain. Then again, I can't even explain what I said to myself. I don't like Josh in that way, that much is true, but I don't like anyone else, right? It was just an excuse – I think.

No. I can't go back.

I head onto the bus when it arrives and sigh into a seat. Things had just started to feel normal between Josh and I, and now everything's messed up again. How on earth are we going to get through rehearsals now?

My heart starts skipping and my arms begin to quiver, my breathing accelerating. No. I can't have a panic attack on the bus.

Come on Piper, breathe.

I attempt some deep breaths and gaze out the window. I look up at the sky and decipher shapes from the clouds. I smile when I see one shaped like a fish and recall when Finn was staring at two blobs of scratched paint on the wall during the A-troupe auditions. I gaze at it until the cloud transforms to an inconceivable blob in the air. The stars emerge and radiate the sky – oh how I'd love to go stargazing one day. The air gradually darkens to a deep blue. The shade of Finn's eyes. They're not just like the ocean but the sky too.

Hang on. Stars. Darkness.

I frantically dig out my phone from my dance bag and hit the home button. 7:32. Flip! My stop was an hour ago! As the bus grinds to a halt, I run off so I can't get any further away. I look around to see that there are no buildings in my sight. I have no idea where I am so I look up my location on Google Maps and search when the next bus is that goes back in the direction of home.