Don't Let It Break Your Heart

6: Bringing Back What Used to Be

                  "Alright, Haz, start with a deep breath for me, okay?" Marcel hums, observing how the lad looked a bit nervous before he began to speak, his eyes brimming in tears and a few fell and hit the palms of his hands, like all of his walls were finally breaking down.

                 "Do you need a minute, if so I can allow it?" As a specialist he knew the signs of an anxiety attack before it even broke through the surface, he also was aware of when his patient would be hiding the majority of their thoughts, unintentionally most of the time. Marcel knew by the silence that he needed a bit of time to gather his perspective into view.

Harry suddenly glanced up at the man with oversized rectangular-shaped glasses and sticky tape in the middle, not professional at all bro, Harry could only think to himself. How was he supposed to trust Marcel after not seeing him for what seemed like forever? No phone call or even a text, Harry was actually puzzled as to why Liam had the audacity to bring him here of all places. 

He could've arrived at any other Therapist's area and the nerves still would've swallowed him alive. Liam cleared his throat and it affected his thought process again, however it managed to get his attention.

              "Haz, I'm sure he doesn't have all day and you aren't his only patient."

Patient. Harry thought to himself, and looked down, feeling vulnerable all of a sudden. That's what it took to click in his mind. He was actually going to be staying here, he wasn't just a client anymore where he would have the opportunity to leave. 

             "Harry Edw-"

            "Shut up, Liam!" You only care because you promised Louis you would take care of me." Harry snapped his neck around to glare at Liam who became awe-stricken. He wasn't supposed to know that, however, it was true, Liam had grown very fond of Harry. "You can't make me better and you think guilt-tripping me by bringing me to a therapist is going to help? What makes you think I want to talk it out, being civil sucks okay?!"

 Marcel put his hand lightly on the fellow's palm, he knew a few ways to soothe the patient out of whatever experience they had going on at the moment.

          "Harry... do you want to take a walk outside for a minute, you and I can go to the closest Starbucks?" His voice was unwavering, even after what he had just experienced. Taking in a deep breath, and waited for Harry to make the decision. He smiled a bit after a while, through the never-ending tears, and nodded slowly, standing to his feet, which was a bit difficult after sitting there for so long. 

Marcel only exults a laugh, his eyes slightly lighting up when Harry looks at him, he had missed him probably more than he would like to admit. When they were real little, harry had this glow about him, and no one took it away, the two had a bond from the very start, and he couldn't remember the exact age maybe he was three or four and Harry was about six. 

         "Wanna play?" Harry would ask, holding onto his toy gun, in his waist belt. Marcel being too young to know many words would just nod his head and follow along with him to the outside balcony. Of course, their mother Anne would watch the two, as a precaution to one of them falling, but it never did. And Marcel to this day remembered playing cowboys and Indians. 

His thoughts are brought back to reality when he heard Liam gasped and went to Harry's rescue who had fainted, probably having a flashback of his own, Marcel shook the feeling realizing that he had more important things to deal with his own perception.

Harry's eyes fluttered open, looking around to see he was somewhere different this time, his vision was quite blurry as he took in a deep breath of air, it felt like his lungs were restricting. Asthma. Damn asthma. 

    "Deep breath H...c'mon on." The words sounding like a distant echo and he could only rasp out the words "I-I can't... just let me die... "

Thinking back to earlier, this all could be an illusion and maybe it was, it could be a possibility that everything was a shady deal he made to Satin himself. Of course, that was only the dryness of his humor, which tended to turn into a dark state of mind when he wasn't himself.  The truth really was, he didn't feel like any of this was real. He felt certain that everything was fading around him just as Louis had. 

        "Louis!" Louis come back, If you come back I'll keep my promise to you, okay? I won't drink anymore, I'll cut myself off and I'll stop hanging out with Nick. I know he is a bad influence on me but he was there when we fought and I felt like I had nobody." Harry glanced down to where he thought he had seen wires and an iv, then a voice was heard, one he could recognize almost immediately. "It's alright love, you don't have to hold on anymore... you know I love you and that's all that matters right?"

~.~

Louis stood in the corner of the room, tears staining his cheeks as they had all day, but since Anne was no longer in the room he could eventfully allow each one to escape without issues getting in the way. Cancer, it's all that the doctor said to him in the hallway. And progressive. It was rapidly progressing in his brain. 

As Louis finally sunk to the floor, he covered his face and sobbed loudly, the tears now more apparent and they could only build behind his eyes, he couldn't stop. 

Everything that life had promised him was broken. Harry had to start doing virtual schooling due to his headaches, which became worse by the days, but Louis tried to be strong for him and helped him write down his answers after the lad would write the questions. Just to keep him from thinking too much. 

      "I'm sorry Harry, I thought the surgery would help you." Louis barely whispered, he peered up from where he was, thinking of what he should say next, or if he could talk at all. When everything happened, it had been several months at least. "I guess I was wr-wrong... and for that, I am truly sorry I-I didn't know what else to do, now you might never wake up and it's my f-fault."

Selfish, it was for Louis to want to keep Harry here, just because he was in love. Thinking the world of Harry was all he had ever done, he knew eventually a time would come where he would need to let go and it would break him. But, of course, he knew that.

"I'm sorry for fighting with you, the last time we fought hurt like hell didn't it? You were crying of course and I was being an absolute blockhead."

Louis didn't realize that Anne had entered the room, he was oblivious to his surroundings, he had a small smile creep over his face and he slowly stood to his feet, a bit shaky from his nerves. 

     "Hello Louis, sorry to disturb you, but I thought you might want something to eat..." Her voice easy going and a bit tired, no telling how long she had actually been here, and Louis didn't have the heart to tell her to go home and get some rest.

   "I-I could use a break anyway," Louis mumbled more to himself, the fact he didn't even remember when he ate last was rather depressing, but then again, as he thought about it, the whole atmosphere around here was depressing. 

  "No, you need some food in your tum," Gemma spoke walking into the room, a bag thrown over her shoulder and still having somewhat of a bubbly personality, he hadn't a clue of how she managed to brighten other people's moods but he was glad she did. Louis could only not his head and bit on his lower lip. "I'll try okay?"