Stonewall prep (A Brett fanfic)

The Downside to everything

Her muffled laugh seemed to fill the room like the sunlight, in fact, she herself seemed to fill the room like the sun.  Willow cast her glance towards Donna a confusing cocktail of emotions filling and emptying her. Donna noticed her expression and before willow said or did anything she climbed into her lap, the blanket wrapped around her, her legs on either side of Willows's lap. "Hey what's up", Donna questioned as she toyed with Willow's hair. "Did I do something wrong?" "No, I actually think I'm the one in the wrong. I'm cheating with you on my boyfriend." "Are you having fun?" "I guess." "Then don't think about that okay? This isn't about anyone but me and you, okay?" " "That's selfish", she replied flatly.

Donna looked at her like she had said the most obvious thing ever. "It is but doesn't act like you don't enjoy it. Plus who cares if it's selfish, you're allowed to be selfish. You're a fucking teenager in high school who gives a shit if you're selfish?" "I-" "Look", Donna interrupted. "If you want to stop this thing me and you have to go, I'll understand. Donna stood up and proceeded to put her clothes back before softly placing a kiss on Willows temple before walking out. Willow just sat there for a moment allowing herself a second to try and piece herself back together.

She felt weird and empty, like she should be feeling and was guilty on multiple different levels and yet didn't have the energy to be anything other than passive about how she felt. It wasn't that she was necessarily numb just empty and hollow. She just sat there at the foot of her bed, naked with not enough energy to actually put clothes back on but too aware to allow herself to go back to bed. So Willow just sat there, in the cold quiet room. The air stale and the sun seemed to shine in a way that caused just enough irritation to cause you to reposition so you were laying on your back. It had been like this since you were in middle school, you would bottle up every little thing until it eventually bubbled up to the point where you couldn't feel anything for a while.

she hated it so much but she never really had the ability to break the cycle. So shed just sit like this for hours, tired and hollow.

The thing is she never had Brett. So when he walked in on her, laying in bed naked and what looked to be hysterically exhausted, she didn't know what to do. He did. He closed the door and made his way over to her closet before handing her, her clothes and shower caddy. He then proceeded to grab a robe and help her put it on softly muttering, "go take a shower, I'll be right here when you get back."
Tears pricked your eyes but you shut yourself down before you could cry and headed to the showers. Did he not see it, the obvious fucking bruises that littered your skin? Could he not smell it on you, the second you got to the showers you turned the water on as hot as possible but still not hot enough to burn you. You scrubbed as hard a possible trying to get the feeling, the smell of her off of your skin. Jesus Christ, it felt like she had seeped into you, you couldn't wash her off. You were stuck with her with what you did with her, with what you did to him.
You dropped the cloth you were washing with and instead balled your fist up and hit the cold tile wall as hard as possible, it didn't break the tile you were naive to expect it to. It just hurts your hand and allowed for more bruises to form on her skin. You stood under the shower until your skin was the same color as the blood at the bottom of the shower. 

You quickly dressed and headed back to your room and there was Brett, just like he said. It made you wanna cry again. He finally noticed you standing there at the door but before he said anything, you collapsed into his arms. The exhaustion and emotional weight being too much for you to handle.  He quickly picked you up, holding you by your thighs, his fingers skimming her venus dimples.

"Hey, hey it's okay." "I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry Brett." "Willow, it okay. You're fine, I hope you know, that I care about you so much and whatever you're going through I'm here for you and, I, well the thing is Willow I love you. I love you so much and if you aren't ready to say it back that's fine."

He loved you. Brett Weston Wallis loved you, you didn't deserve it. You didn't deserve the piece of himself that he gave so willingly to you. He shouldn't love you, why the hell did he love you. He didn't know how much you were hurting him but he trusted you enough to tell you that he loved you. "I love you, Brett, so much ." You buried his head further into his chest, preventing him from meeting your eyes, you couldn't bear to meet his eyes. You weren't lying, or at least not about the fact that you loved him.

A/N school is icky, and I dislike it so much but whatever. Hope you guys enjoyed the new chapter. Feel free to leave criticism or your general thoughts below. Remember to drink some water your gorgeous plants. Also I'm hosting a Q&A and will be publishing all questions you ask in a separate chapter so leave your question in the comments.