The John Hughes Club

Chapter Thirty Three

Chas

Mindy's mum hates me.
After tonight, I know that to be true. I've always thought it to be the case, but now I know that I am right. On the few and brief occasions I have met her, she's always been off with me. Indifferent and aloof. Whereas Mindy's dad has only ever been friendly and pleasant. If I wasn't so sure of Mindy's feelings for me, I'd be worried. After her mum seeing me with my tongue down her daughter's throat and my hands up her t-shirt, she's going to do everything she can to split us up, so it's my responsibility to not give her any ammunition to do just that. Grandpa always told me to rise above the low opinions that some people may have of me, which I will do. For whatever reason, Mindy's mother doesn't want me anywhere near her daughter. I saw the way she looked at me, I heard the venom in her voice. If looks could kill, I'd not be here, that's for sure. I don't know what I have done, but anything I do from here on in, has to be done knowing that Mindy's mother wants me out of her daughter's life.
Maybe she's threatened?
Maybe she's overprotective?
I know they've not always got along, but Mindy has been saying how much better they have been getting on recently. The battles between them have stopped. And I know that has made my girl happier. Mindy herself, is happier. Which is why I hope that her mother doesn't manage to split us up. I love that girl. With my own pair of eyes, I have seen that girl shed her burdens, shed her guilt. There will always be the residue of blame and of grief on the skin of Mindy, but she has been learning to live with that residue. She is emerging into a stable and strong human being, a human being who makes my own life much more bearable. In her, I have found my own happiness. She makes this crazy world make sense to me. She makes it a less daunting place to be. So, I'm worried. With my head on my pillow, those worried thoughts are filling it, filling it to the point that I now have a pounding headache.
I can't lose her.
I can't.
Since I was seven years old, the world hasn't made sense to me. Losing my mum at that age, has meant that I've constantly been trying to keep up with life, constantly trying to fit into it during a time when I was questioning why I had to be the young boy who lost his mother and a set of grandparents. Losing my mum, set in motion circumstances that no child should ever have to go through. Dad became so consumed by his grief, that there was no room left for me in his miserable life. Where I should have been, alcohol took my place. If it weren't for my other grandparents, especially my grandpa, I can honestly say I don't know whether I'd still be here. They guided me through the dark times, navigated me through the shadows of sadness. They gave me morals, when my father had lost his. They protected me, when my father no longer could. Ultimately, they equipped me with love and belonging. Which is why I am so scared of losing Mindy. Not since my grandparents, have I felt that love and belonging with someone. But with Mindy, I do. We may be young, but a love like ours is as old as time. A love like ours, some people wait their entire lives to have. So I'm prepared to fight to keep that love in my life. Losing grandpa left me lost, then I found Mindy. I'll not let her mum snuff out our love like it's a meaningless flame. I'll not let her take away my happiness, and more importantly, her daughter's happiness. Breathing in harshly, my head still feels like it's about to explode. Grabbing my pen and notepad, I need to empty my heavy mind. I need to purge my harassing thoughts onto the paper in front of me.

Slipping through my fingers,
Slipping from my life.

A mother's look of contempt,
Twisting like a blunt knife.

How can love survive,
When cornered by doubts and hate.

A new love like ours,
Is now within the palms of fate.

Life is a succession,
Of filling in the blanks.

With Mindy by side,
I'll gladly fill them in with thanks.

For my love for her is real,
As real as any love can be.

I am glad about who she is,
She makes me glad that I am me.

The crazies speak with the voice of sanity,
The sane flirt with craziness.

The world is a hard place to be,
Full of hurt, sin and mess.

The world won't drag me down,
The doubters won't tear us apart.

They might reach our minds,
But they'll never reach our hearts.