The John Hughes Club

Chapter Forty Four

At lunch, Chas came to find me, and we've both been sat with Ros, Ella and Zigs, talking about as much as we can possibly fit into our break time. Much of nothing has been shared, yet it feels good to be sharing youthful thoughts, trivia and silliness. It feels good to be a teenager again. To be that person with my friends from Minehead and with my much missed boyfriend closely by my side. If we're not touching in some small way, we're always close. Both of us have needed the affirmation of one another's presence, the affirmation of our feelings, and the affirmation of us deciding that our love refuses to be complicated because of our parents. Nothing about us needs to be hard. Come what may, Chas and I are back together. I don't want to fight against that anymore, and I don't want to fight against my mother about it either. Whatever happens, myself and him are in this together. Whatever our parents say, won't quell our love. Our love is resilient and stronger than ever.

"I'll wait for you just outside school, yeah?" Chas cutely comments beneath the loud trill of the school bell, surveying me with his glittery brown eyes.

Mooning up at him, I bounce a little on the balls of my feet. "You better had," I tease, my eyes roaming down to where his plump and needing-to-be-kissed lips are. We've already made a spectacle of ourselves in Citizenship, I'll refrain from us being that again in the lunch hall. Instead, I tug gently on the bottom corner of his leather jacket. "I'll see you later." Then I set about leaving him with a parting smile upon my smitten mouth.

As I pivot on my springy soles, I'm quickly spun back around by a hand that's both strong and gentle. In a wonderful second, I am contently flush against the warm lines of Chas's body. "You've made me so happy that you're back, Mindy...I just need you to know that." In another wonderful second, he kisses the curve of my neck, smothering my skin with his featherlight affection. Then, it is him who leaves me with a parting smile upon his smitten mouth.

For just a few enamoured moments, I am left standing on my swooning spot. For a few more enamoured moments, a smile creeps onto my face. As more enamoured moments pass, a ginormous swell of happiness starts spreading throughout me, a warmness of love being distributed to every part of my body. This is the thoroughbred of happiness. The purest kind. The powerful kind. And for me, the lucky kind. To know that the hurt I caused Chas hasn't stunted his love for me, makes me the happiest teenager alive. The plan was to not make a spectacle of us, yet here I am, making a complete spectacle of myself. But it's a blissful spectacle. A swooning spectacle. Being a spectacle has never felt so amazing.

After school, I know that Chas and I have some serious things to talk about, but for now, I'm just allowing myself to be floating with my thoughts, with my feelings, and to float along with our love.
I thought it was gone.
I thought I'd never get it back.
Which is why I am more than happy to lose myself for a little while with how lucky and loved I actually feel.

"Come on, one half of love's young dream...we've got Art," interrupts a jovial Ros. "I'm sure you'll be able to channel some of that passion in class," she teases, dragging me along.

"I'm sorry. Am I being spew-worthy?" I half joke, the other half seriously wanting to know whether my obvious feelings for Chas are causing half the pupils of Archleigh to reach for the nearest vom bucket.

Striding by my left side, Ros appears to be wearing a smile of smug delight. "Mindy, you needn't apologise for being head over heels for someone. As your friend, I couldn't be happier that you're happy. As for Chas, I'm even happier for him. I only bumped into him a couple of times over the summer, and I never told you because you already had enough going on...but he wasn't the same Chas without you here."

Invisibly gnawing away at my love-soaked confidence, is guilt. That guilt, just as invisible, now batters my insides. I've been so caught up with how good it feels to be with Chas again, I have unforgivably forgotten how bad things were for him when I selfishly left. For that, I feel awful. For that, I have to apologise. An unsaid sadness is now welling in both my stomach and in my throat, and it will sit there until I can speak to Chas after school. "I can't believe he is giving me a second chance, Ros. It's more than I deserve," I sullenly murmur.

Linking arms with me, Ros gives my forearm a happy little squeeze. "Don't be daft. You never even used up your first chance with him, Mindy. He's over the moon you're back, everyone could see that at lunchtime. Not only did you return, confident and cool Chas has also returned. Even his quiff is back high and gelled...yup, the boy's super duper happy!" she teasingly retorts.

Contemplating what Ros has just said to me, my guilt lessens...a little. "Thank you. I needed to hear that, I really did." My gratitude reaches my mouth, causing it to curl with an appreciative grin.

With a sunny cheerfulness in her walk, her hold on my arm remains reassuring. "It's a new term, new beginnings, new everything. Both you and Chas need to put that hellish summer behind you now. If you guys want to be together, then that is what you should do...be together."

During my time in Stratford, Ros and I remained in touch. Even though I had ran back to my dad, my old friends and my old home, this amazing girl stuck by me. The unlikeliest of people, has become one of my people, an important part of my inner circle. For that, I am just as thankful. The death of our sister's had brought our friendship together, but it's no longer what keeps our friendship together. In a matter of months, we have forged a strong bond. Bound by respect and admiration for one another. "You're amazing! Do you know that?" Smiling, I slow down our carefree strides, now that we have reached the art department.

Removing a Scrunchie from her wrist, she happily ties her long brown hair up into a cute and disheveled topknot. "Have you only just realised that?" Her blue eyes naughtily twinkle back at me, her smug delight returning to her lips.

"It was an oversight on my part," I teasingly remark, regarding her with more of my smile.

Swinging one arm around my shoulder and bringing her cheek next to mine, Ros embraces me with all of her affectionate enthusiasm. "You, me, and Chas, we of all people really do know how short life can be. Life is for living, not for holding back...promise me you won't do that anymore?" she now asks, observing me with a soft seriousness stretching across her features.

My newly awakened sense of life, and the thoughtful reminder from Ros about having the utmost respect for it, has my answer ready for her, "I promise."

Not only am I promising Ros, I am making the same promise to myself and to Chas.
Life is for living.
It's not for holding back.
I intend to do both.