The John Hughes Club

Chapter Thirteen

"That's quite an eventful Sunday evening." Chas states, repeatedly nodding with his understanding of why I'm so thoroughly fed up.

As soon as the bell rang for morning break time, Chas had me hurry outside with him, so we could sit under one of the old oak trees on the school field, keeping our bums damp-free by sitting on our coats. I've talked, he's listened. Now, he's digesting all that I've told him about discovering my mum in the shower with another man. Picking at the grass, I now feel like I need to admit something else to him. "I just feel so weird about it. Angry weird. Does that make sense?"

Again, Chas is sympathetically nodding. "It does. It's bound to feel weird. We think of our parents as just our parents, we're not emotionally equipped enough to deal with the knowledge that they're having sex." Having a quick sip of his water, he has more to say as soon as he's swallowed it down. "For you, it's harder to get your head around, because your mum wasn't having sex with your dad...it's a double blow."

Just hearing Chas say that, causes a dull ache within my beating heart. My poor dad. He has no idea about what mum has done. He constantly sticks up for her, defends her when I'm angry at her about something, because deep down, he still loves the woman. Divorce papers, aren't going to change his feelings for my mum overnight. Which is why I'm so gut-wrenchingly conflicted about all of this. I don't want to be the one to tell him that I heard mum screwing someone in her shower. He's had enough to deal with. I'm not going to be the one who's going to hurt him some more. "My dad would be gutted if he knew." Quietly escapes me, that ache inside of my heart now getting achier and achier.

Staring across at me, Chas thinks for a moment. He's thinking, staring at me with brown-eyed warmth. He's the kind of boy, who when he's looking at you, he really looks at you. He's saying nothing, yet those orbs of morel fondness of his, are saying everything. Wow! How those eyes talk to me, talk to me in so many comforting ways. Within his stare, within this moment—I'm no longer feeling so bad. I would like to reach out and touch him, but of course, I won't. Touching is feeling, and feelings, they don't come so easy these days.

"Your dad is going to be okay, Mindy." Chas softly says, wanting to stop the ache that he senses is beating inside of my chest. "You're going to be okay." The imprint of a small smile now turns up one side of his confident mouth.

"I don't know about that, Chas." Sadly rolls of my tongue with no hesitation. "With my mum, things haven't been okay for quite some time."

"Why?"

To tell Chas about mum and that man is one thing, I just don't think my heart can take telling him about Anais. Not now. Not today. I've still got to make it through the rest of the school day, opening up that heartbreaking can of worms about my sister, is something I just can't face. "We just clash. We have for a long time. Mum doesn't get me like my dad does." Is all my heart is willing to give him.

Breathing in harshly, Chas again seems to understand. "Yeah, my relationship with my dad isn't great, either." Bringing his knees up to his chest, it's like he's unconsciously now needing to embrace himself. "He doesn't get me, and frankly, I don't get him. Grandpa practically brought me up, he was always my anchor in life, but now that he's gone...I don't know what's to come with my dad." For the first time ever, Chas has given me something tangible that's confirmed to me why our connection runs so deep, why it's running so quickly deep. It's our hurt, drawing us together. Our hurt, binding us. Hurt can sometimes find solace with what it knows, what it understands; Chas and I, and all that's hurting us...found one another.

"When did you lose your grandpa?" I ask him, my eyes now softly regarding him like they're looking at a longtime friend.

"Four months ago." Chas solemnly tells me, hugging his knees a little bit tighter, needing to no longer have our eyes locked on one another. Clearing the emotion that's beginning to clog up his throat, Chas is now staring out at the school field. "He was an amazing man. Set in his ways, but he had such an open heart and mind. Without him, I think my life would have been so much harder. Without him, I don't think I would have turned out so good." Chuckling a little, he's sniffing more of his emotion back up his nostrils. "I was really young when my grandma died, so grandpa kind of took on both the roles of being a grandparent. He showed me how to make rock cakes. He taught me how to have strong opinions, without being disrespectful to those who don't share my opinions. He wanted me to know right from wrong. He wanted me to be my own person, to be happy with who that person is. He also taught me that it's okay to think outside the box, to do my own thing...yeah, he was an amazing man."