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Chapter 46

I can't pretend that I don't miss you
Every now and then
But the hurt is for the better
Moving on, it's now or never

– Alessia Cara, River of Tears

. . . .

The thin air around us is unbearable to stand as the tension thickens between our awkward silence. Every now and then, I glance out of the corner of my to ensure that she's not creeping towards me with a knife ready to slaughter me into chunks. It's taking me so damn long to find the God-forsaken binder and there's nothing more that I want than to be out of this room for as long as I possibly can.

"Looking for this?"

I turn my head towards Annie's thin body with my white binder in her skinny fingers. The malicious grin never once left her lips from the minute I opened that door.

"Please give it back."

"What's the fun in that? Besides, I thought we could chat."

I scoff loudly at her absurd idea, "What could you possibly want to talk about? I thought you hated me."

"Did I say I didn't?" she exhales loudly and throws my binder onto the floor at my feet. "Let me guess, after you ran out of here yesterday you went to him. Always running back to him as if he's Jesus himself and you feel obligated to kiss the ground he walks on even though he repeatedly screws you over like every guy you ever date. You just can't seem to find the right guys."

I'm trying to keep my cool and not grab the pair of sharp scissors in the cup on my desk to chop a plentiful chunk of blonde hair from her head. It's so difficult, but I push through it. Instead, I just kill her with my words instead of physical violence.

"Says the girl who was cheated on with multiple girls and the man who she thought loved her was sent to jail. You can say that all the shit that you think happened with me was true, but you can't try to prove to me that what he and I have is fake. You're just too blinded by your own failed relationship to see the purity and rawness of mine."

She's shocked and speechless, to say the least. The audible gulp and the actions of her rubbing her hands against her skirt are proof enough that I caught her off guard. She's not as confident and straightforward as she's led on to believe.

"You weren't saying that a few months ago when he made you feel like shit constantly."

I ignore her remark and ask, "Why do you still think I don't care about you? I would've listened if you would have told me how you felt with everything that happened with Niall."

"Oh, please. You would've made it all about you. You would've tried to compare my relationship to yours, when they're completely different things."

"No, I would've helped you," I defend myself.

"You weren't doing much of that. You had to have known that him getting arrested absolutely crushed me—"

"Yeah, and when I came up here to console you, you beat the shit out of me."

"It was deserved."

Trying to let that remark roll off my back, I move forward with the conversation, "And why do you think that I didn't try to help you?"

"Jealousy, revenge, pure bitchiness? I don't fucking know." She crosses her arms across her chest and throws daggers at me with her cold blue eyes.

"You know what? Fine. If you don't want to be friends, I don't care anymore. It's not like you even want to by the looks of it. I'm done with you. I'm tired of your shit. Have a nice life wallowing in your self pity and visiting your prison boyfriend."