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Chapter 135

It's the most wonderful time of the year
There'll be much mistltoeing
And hearts will be glowing
When loved ones are near
It's the most wonderful time of the year

— Andy Williams, It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

. . . .

Tomorrow is Christmas—mine and Harry's first official holiday together as a couple. Last year wasn't enjoyable in the slightest from having to leave the house after getting into an argument with him and being picked up by Mr. Horan on the side of the road, which may or may not have inevitably initiated the slow rise of my best friend hating me.

I really hope this Christmas goes better than last year's. It'll be one of the first Christmases that I'm not alone or shipped away to a grandparent that believes I'm a life-ruining mistake.

This year, however, I'm spending it with my family, Harry and his daughter, and his family. I tried compromising with Harry that I would stay overnight at my dad's house, open presents with them, eat breakfast, and have a normal Christmas morning of waking up surrounded by my immediate family. Then I'd come back here to begin Christmas morning with Harry and Lilly as we open presents and watch Christmas movies. Later on, when it's time for dinner, we'd go to his parent's house to exchange some gifts and have Christmas dinner.

I wanted a Christmas with my family that I had missed out on for so many years, and I'm finally getting that. Christmas used to be my favorite holiday until my parents broke up, Dad met Bonnie and transferred to New York, and I went with my mum and step-dad before her untimely death. From there, I spent every Christmas alone... until now.

I want this Christmas to be perfect—for myself and everyone around me.

As I'm packing an overnight bag for my dad's, Harry comes in, his thumbs tapping his screen as a settled frown draws his lips downward in a disappointed expression. I'm folding an extra thong in my bag when I hear Harry say the name 'Emma'. I turn back to him as he sits on the edge of the bed with the phone cemented to his ear.

"Emma," he breathes into the butt end of the phone and runs his hand through his hair. "Please tell me you got Lilly something that shows that you care."

He puts her on speaker as he removes his shoes from coming back to the house after running out to the store to get a few things for his and Lilly's dinner tonight.

"You know I don't have an overflowing amount of cash right now?" She replies back with such a snarky tone. I imagine she's rolling her eyes.

"Okay, I get that you don't want to be a mum, but would you lay off the shit of not caring about our daughter. Whether you like it or not, you're her mother. Show her you care, she deserves that."

"You wanted her. You have her. You can spoil her rotten until her ears fucking bleed with sugar."

"You're so selfish, Emma."

"Right, I'm selfish. I stayed home to breastfeed her while you worked. I had to listen to her screaming the entire day and she wouldn't shut up when I tried to hold her!"

"You barely did that! My mum had to remind you to pump breast milk for Lilly because you were too damn irresponsible to remember yourself. She screamed and cried because she was a baby. That's what babies do. I worked my ass off to support both you and Lilly. Looking back, spending any money on you was a huge mistake. I'm thankful I returned the engagement ring I bought for you so you couldn't pawn it off for your drug money. You're a selfish woman, Emma. Grow the fuck up."

I expect her to reply back with something to the extent of what Harry said and with her point of view, but in a twisted way, says something much worse and harsher.