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Chapter 146

I'll seek you out
Flay you alive
One more word and you won't survive
And I'm not scared
Of your stolen power
I see right through you any hour

— Blue Foundation, Eyes on Fire

. . . .

When Bonnie pulls up to the house, I thank her for her generosity today then climb out of the car. I kept my head down for most of the ride here, and I continue to do so on my walk up the driveway. The headlights of Bonnie's car fade as she backs out of the driveway and disappears down the street. Sliding my key in the lock, I take a deep breath to brace myself for what's about to happen.

The door glides open, but rather than Harry, Lilly, and the asshole who is currently freeloading off of him, I'm met with five guys sat on the furniture with a game flashing on the tv. Beside Harry is the man that's ruining my life at the moment. All eyes focus on me when the door shuts behind me.

"Hey, Vi," Harry smiles and stands up while men in varying colors kick a ball around on the tv. He kisses me then wraps his hands around my waist. "How was your time at your dad's?"

There are too many varying factors going on at once. My mind is running ramped with the men cheering, bottles clinking, laughter, Harry's hands, his cheerful expression, Dr. Spencer stealing glances at us, and of course, the looming story of my unfortunate week.

I can't possibly tell him right now about what's going on. There are too many people here to witness this, and the slight bit of courage I've felt has now vanished. My apprehension grows even more within the short twenty seconds that I stepped into the house.

"It was alright," I reply, mentally and physically drained. "Sorry I didn't get home until now. I fell asleep and had dinner over there."

"No, don't worry about it. I figured since you were spending some time over there I'd invite some of the guys over to watch the game, especially since Adam's here."

In return, I give him a tight-lipped smile and remove myself from the situation entirely. Harry returns back to his spot on the sofa between Spencer and his other friend Ben whom I met briefly during Harry's birthday.

The bathroom light is on and the door is slightly ajar. I'm assuming Lilly's taking her bath in there since she's not playing in her room or with her dollhouse. I shut the door to mine and Harry's bedroom and strip from my clothes for a shower.

During my shower, I thought over everything. How could I have let this go on long enough to the point that I have to wait yet another day to finally tell him? Harry doesn't deserve to be led on like this. He has an illusory visual of the trust in his friendship. He has no idea what lie he's living, and that's partly my fault.

I have all the power to tell him and end all of this nonsense. Finding that strength and willfulness is the challenging part.

He's such a sweet man with a good heart. He's nurturing and insanely humorous. He's charming and handsome. That man is everything I could ever wish for, and I'm petrified that he's going to lose trust in everyone.

What if he stops trusting me? I am keeping a massive secret from him. What if he thinks I'm keeping more? His best friend is betraying him. He could lose his compassion and immediately believe that he can believe in no one and that nobody will ever be faithful to him again.

I've seen him hit rock-bottom when his dad died. I would loathe seeing him go through that again.

Once I step out, I get dressed and for however many nights in a row, I wait in our room alone when we should be talking and joking around with one another or making love. The tv is of little interest to me and the cheering and laughter coming from the other room is distracting me from everything else—except for my turbulent thoughts.