Fire & Ice - A Draco Malfoy fanfiction

Chapter 60 - Limerence, another one of those beautiful words from my list

Accountability feels like an attack when you're not ready to acknowledge how your behaviour harms others. You have to silence your ego in order to take accountability for your own actions.

- Tamara Renaye

DRACO'S POV

I woke up to Eleanor frantically running around, hopping on one foot to get her shoe on.

"What are you doing?" I asked as I stretched out my sore limbs. I hadn't slept this well in ages, even though I had slept on the floor with my back against a couch. I hadn't had any nightmares.

"I've got Arithmancy in three minutes", she said as she shoved her book into her bag. "I have to go right now." She ran towards the exit, trying to fix her hair on the way there. She looked beautiful anyway.

"Meet me in the library in two hours, okay?" she said and then, the door closed behind her. I didn't even care if anyone had seen her exit this room. All I could do was smile at where she was just standing. It felt good to smile again.

She had been in my arms all night and it made me never want it any other way again. I sighed as I stood up, just to sit down on the couch again. Had last night really happened?

I had cried in front of her. I had never cried in front of anyone except for my mother. But she didn't leave me. She stayed and she pulled me into her embrace and told me that everything would be okay. And for a moment I believed her, and maybe I still did.

I closed my eyes again. Just a couple more days and then we'd go home for a week for Easter break. After that, I had less than three more months to get this cabinet finished whilst also trying to find out how the bloody hell I was going to go through with this task. I could bring a hundred Death Eaters in the school, but I still had to kill him.

I didn't think Eleanor fully realised what I had to do. I had to take someone's life. Would she look at me the same afterwards? Would she still love me when she knew that I had murdered someone?

I took a deep breath, trying not to panic. I still had three months to get this done and I was close. I just had to pass by Borgin and Burkes to discuss it with the owner again and then I was sure that I could fix it.

I was scared of what would happen afterwards. We'll figure something out, Eleanor had said. Could we? What would happen when Dumbledore was gone? Who would be in charge of Hogwarts? It wouldn't be long before the Ministry was overthrown. We'd be around Death Eaters all the time. Could we figure something out? Was there any possibility at all?

I forced myself to stop thinking about it because it was driving crazy thoughts into my mind again. I had Ellie back, she didn't hate me. I couldn't mess that up now. We'd see what would happen during the summer, but right now I needed her.

ELEANOR'S POV

For a moment, I was scared that he wouldn't show up, that he had changed his mind. But at exactly eleven o'clock, he walked into the library, scanning the room until his eyes met mine. I had sat down at the far back of the library, where no one else was.

"Hi", he said with a small smile and put down his bag. I felt warm inside when I saw him, I felt proud.

"I got some books that might help", I said, pushing the stack his way.

"I read that already", he said whilst he put the first book to the side. "And that one, and that one." He went through all the books, but none were new to him.

"Well that was a waste of time", I chuckled as he put the last book to the side.

"It's fine, I've got some books I wanted to check out", he said and got out a piece of parchment from his bag. "I'll get them, you stay here."