Once in a lifetime.

43

October

Dalton

God, I miss her, so much that sometimes I lay in bed and just think about the ways that I could go back and make her feel better and myself less like an ass. I love her, but I have lost the right to love her. I don't know why I didn't just tell her what was going on with me. I was scared because she loves me so much and I was afraid that I'd do something wrong. I could never be happy enough for her, present enough. Juliet deserves someone better than what I can give her.

I look at the pictures we took often, the one of us sticking our tongues out is my favorite, we were so similar without even meaning to be. In a short period of time, I fell in love with my best friend and I can't do that, I can't leave her alone like that, like I already have. I still have hope for us, maybe it's not as strong as it used to be, but it's there.

I want to come back to her one day when she'll have me, and I think I will after I am finished with this tour, when I can get my shit together. I look at the picture and look right at her eyes. I remember how her eyes light up when she laughs and when she's happy. Her body is perfect, maybe a little too skinny, but so am I, and her hips feel so good in my hands, her lips, oh my, I wish she was here because just thinking about her kisses are getting my mind all foggy.

That's it, I can't take it anymore, I have to see her, I have to touch her, I need to be able to lace my fingers through her hair again. More than anything I want to be able to taste her again. I want to run up to her and drop to one knee and ask her to be my wife just so that I don't have to wait to see her, I want her to travel the rest of the world with me, I want to see her face not only brighten from one of my stupid a jokes, but also from the sun rising over the mountains and the hills. We have a show coming up soon nearby her and I could always stop in and see if she would take me back. Yes, that's what I'm going to do, I'll get a plane ticket and go see her.