All A Joke (Eren X Reader) {Modern AU}

\87/

Y/N POV

Once me and Levi had calmed down, we had gotten up and gotten ready. He cooked breakfast  and made some tea for us. 

Things weren't awkward between us at all which was great, but we both knew there were going to be boundaries between what is acceptable between us. 

At around noon, Levi had dropped me off at my house. He said he might stop by after work but that he can't make any promises.

Once I was alone, I felt out of it. 

Levi has been my best friend for so long. I think it is just something I need to grasp onto. We have to act more like friends than the way we had been acting. 

He wanted us to have a life together. 

I wanted to marry me, start a family with me, grow old with me. He had all these emotions towards me, and I didn't know about it and I didn't have the same feelings towards him. 

But thinking about it, how badly does this change our relationship. 

I like Eren a lot, but do I really want to be with him. 

I did some cleaning around the house and the doorbell rang. 

I was a little confused it was around 1:45 so it couldn't be Levi, he was probably already at work. 

I went to the front and look through the peep hole. 

It's not healthy to do things on impulse. 

It's not healthy to do things on impulse. 

It's not healthy to do things on impulse. 

I opened the door. 

"Eren, hello, um, what are you doing here?" I asked him. 

"Y/N, hi, um, I actually wanted to talk with you about yesterday. And I wanted to apologize for my actions. I was just..." I had interrupted him. 

"Eren I'm really not in the best head space right now to be thinking and talking about this." I said to him thinking about the conversation I had with Levi earlier today. 

"Oh... ok yeah sorry. Maybe we can talk about it soon." He said sounding a bit sad and defeated. 

"Yeah, maybe." I said. 

"I want to work things out between us. Maybe its best we try and go for a platonic friendship." Eren said. 

I don't want to talk about this. 

It'll only hurt. 

It's not healthy to do things on impulse. 

It's not healthy to do things on impulse. 

"Yeah." I said looking down. 

Maybe being friends with Eren is all that should happen. 

Maybe we just aren't meant to be. 

Maybe the universe is just telling me I can't be happy in a romantic relationship with Eren. 

"When you're ready to talk, I'll be around Y/N." He said with a soft smile and walked away towards his car. 

I closed the door and just stood there. 

"Only friends." I whispered. 

Maybe I'm not meant to be in a relationship with anyone. 

What if I just pack up a bag and go away for a few days? 

Would that help me clear up my mind a bit?

It's basically running away again. 

That's all I know to do. 

Then my phone began to ring. 

This was a surprise. 

It was my mom. 

"Hello?" I answered. 

"Hi sweetheart. I thought I would call and see how things were going? I haven't talked to you in a while." She said on the other side. 

I sighed. 

"A lot has gone on mom, so much has happened since I last talked to you." 

"Did you want to talk about it?" She asked. 

"Well, there is one big thing that has happened." 

"Is it that Levi got you pregnant?" 

Huh? 

"Wait what? No no it doesn't have to do with Levi. Why did you think I would say I was pregnant?" 

"I don't know, you just never know. He's a good guy, he'd be a great father. Well anyway what were you going to say?" 

"Eren is back from the military." I said. 

There was no response. 

The line was quiet.

"Um mom?" 

I still didn't get a response. 

Did she hang up? 

No she didn't. 

"I wasn't aware he had enlisted into the military." She had said. She didn't sound all that happy. 

"Yeah, I didn't know until about a few months ago. His little cousin gets tutoring from the place me and Levi work at." 

"I see, well I hope he's well." 

"Yeah, he seems to be well." 

"I have to get going Y/N, I'll call you soon and maybe we can grab lunch together or something." 

"Sounds good mom. Take care, I love you."

"I love you too sweetheart. Bye" 

Then she hung up. 

I knew she wouldn't be happy about me bringing up Eren again. 

Maybe I need to go on a walk. 

There is a park close by, maybe I can go there and walk around a bit. It's cold outside though. 

But, it's either I sit here and mope or I go and take a walk in the cold. 

No it's ok, I'll mope here. 

I need to nap. 

I just feel so drained from everything. 

I'm just... tired. 

We'll nap and then we'll maybe call Eren to talk or something. 

I just don't know what I want. 

I know I want Eren, but does he want me?

Does he really think staying friends would be the better option. 

I went to my room to lay down. 

Maybe I'll think some more when I wake up.