A café in London

Best friend + Brother

"Are you crazy?" My brother, Joe, sat on the couch beside me, I was wrapped in a blanket, "How did you ruin a chance with Harry like that?"

Joe used to watch the Sidemen a lot when he was younger but as he grew up, he grew out of them too. 

"I don't know! I don't remember anything after collapsing to the ground."

"I know for a fact that if I was their you would still be with Harry right now. No one else would be allowed to have their hands on you." 

Joe had came down a few days ago, shocked at my state. I remember when he came in first Hayden had whispered to him 'She's going through some boy troubles right now, be patient with her' and then I had to tell Joe that I had ruined things with Harry. He made food for me and made sure I was looking after myself. I was never normally so... broken by a boy but because I was the one who caused the hurt I was overwhelmed with emotions of guilt. 

"Have you spoken to any of them since it happened? Tobi? Josh? JJ?" He had brought his kitten with him, to keep us all company and he le me claim it. He called the kitten Charlie because he missed me so much, I really appreciated it. It made me feel missed and wanted. Joe and I didn't get to spend a lot of time together much anymore. We were both pretty busy with our jobs.

Speaking of my job I left Paxton to run the café for a bit because I kept on having panic attacks and my anxiety was pretty bad at the moment. This happens every 5 months or so where my mental health gets the better of me and I have to stay in my house until I get the energy to leave. 

"No, Tobi told me that I can't speak to any of them and Josh and JJ were honestly very pissed at me. I don't think Simon or Vik will want to speak to me either. I haven't heard anything from Ethan since I let, well, the day after I came home he messaged me asking if I had gotten home safe and if I was alright but I just ignored him and he hasn't bothered to check in since then. Sometimes I think it's for the best, being distanced from each of them as it means I can try get one with my life." Stroking Charlie made me more calm, I wanted to steal her. 

"You must miss them all a lot don't you?" Joe wrapped his arm around me while Hayden tidied the living room. He picked up all the tissues that were scattered around my feet. 

"Yeah I do, I think that as time goes on I'll end up forgetting about them all. I'll heal, so will he." I shrugged. 

"Definitely, why don't we all go out for dinner tonight? We should go out and eat and have good chats. Bring Hannah? We can all go out as a four it'll be fun." Joe suggested to Hayden who agreed eagerly. 

"Please, it'll give our little depressed ball of cuteness some social interaction." Picked up his phone and started texting his girlfriend. 

"Come on let's pick out an outfit shall we?" Joe lifted me from the couch, I groaned reluctantly as he dragged me to my bedroom, dumping me on the bed and going into my wardrobe. 

He was the best brother anyone could ask for, I am the most lucky. I have never been so happy when I'm around my rock, my brother.