"Dahyun. We need to go." Taehyung whispered, begging me with his own voice. "Wait. I need t-to see." I stuttered in a whisper, clicking on her name to check the history of visitations. I ignored the steps that seem to become louder, focusing on all the dates my mother wanted to visit. There were hundreds and hundreds of documented visitations that I never got. As my eyes painfully observed the bright screen that brought nothing but pain. I knew for a fact one thing. I needed to visit my mother. As soon as we get out. I need to see her. As we get out. Getting out. Are we really getting out? "Dahyun, what the fuck are you doing? Let's go." Taehyung's agitated and scared tone broke of my loud thoughts, making me move in sudden nervousness. He grabbed my hand as I tightly held onto him, both of us running to the door of the stairway. I opened the metal green door and let Taehyung enter first. I gently closed the door after us and without a though started going down the staircase to the back exit. I felt myself become dizzy, all these thoughts controlling my body and that fragile sanity spot of my mind. I held my tears away, trying to not focus at him, as I knew it would only make me cry. "Dah, wait. Are you okay? What stopped you up there?" He softly spoke, trying to make sure if I was feeling bad or not. "Let's just get out of here. Quickly." I spoke as I ignored his figure that followed me to my side. He desperately tried to look to my face that I managed to hide so successfully. Taehyung started to worry a lot, seeing me act up all scared and upset. With quiet steps, we managed to silently pass another floor down. I reached the ground floor first and stood in front of the back exit door. I fiddled with the keys for a few seconds, but managed to unlock the door. I stepped outside and felt emotion wash over me like it would before of a bad episode. The sudden feeling of freedom did not feel as freeing as I would have expected it to be. It all felt rather scary and unknown, something that violently broke through the bubble of the things I knew. That air felt different from the one on the roof. When we were on the roof, we knew that we could get back to our warm room and let the kisses warm each other's stomach up. This felt too real, and I felt like that scared 12 year old that desperately wanted to seek safety that a world couldn't offer.
The sound of the doors closing behind me, made me turn towards him. My eyes couldn't hold my tears back anymore, making them roll of my cheeks so easily. "da-" Taehyung spoke, immediately wrapping me in for a hug. He held me tightly, making it not readable if he was stiffening under my touch or if he genuinely wanted to hold me tightly. "What did you see, dahyun? What's wrong?" His soft voice spoke to me as he gently stroked my hair. Through the sobs, I managed to let a few words out, feeling so vulnerable and weak in front of him. "My mother visited me. She's been visiting me through all these years, b-but I'm such a selfish asshole, too self-centred to think about her or anyone." I cried into his chest, immediately telling him everything that was on my mind. "You're not like that dahyun. At least not anymore." He softly spoke back. "It's going to be okay. It all surprised you a bit, now it's okay. We can visit her if you want once we find somewhere to stay." He whispered, his palms not being able to detach from my soft hair. "R-really?" I spoke, looking into his eyes. He wiped the tear the was sliding down my cheek, making sure it wouldn't roll down to my neck. "Of course." He spoke as he slowly blinked, still having me close to him. I looked down and after a few long seconds broke the silence off by speaking. "How can you even handle my outbursts like these so well?" I asked, not wanting to look into his eyes. "I'm handling them well? I had no idea." He spoke in a bright manner, wanting to make me smile. I slightly managed to smile, looking down to his pretty hands. "Some of them are not really understandable, but ones like these - I get them. It's hard to run away from a place you grew to know as home. All because of a stupid daisy boy." He spoke, making me giggle at his foolish insult to himself.
"See, at least me insulting myself will always make you laugh." He giggled, making me move away and softly smile. "You can call me Rat again if that makes you feel better." He spoke and I widened my eyebrows with a smile as I began walking out of the alley with Taehyung hurriedly following my steps. "I hated calling you Rat, even when it sounded endearing." I confessed, adjusting the bag so it wouldn't feel too heavy on my shoulder. "What? I loved when you called me Rat! It was so ironic it became adorable." He enthusiastically said, the light from the street softly reflecting onto his face once we reached the exit of the dark alley. Calling it adorable made my cheeks slightly blush like a little child's, my thoughts turning from bad ones to good ones in just a matter of seconds. I started feeling positive energy pass from Taehyung onto me, making me believe this really wasn't a bad idea after all. Maybe life with Taehyung was all I ever needed. A boy like that, away from thoughts and that hospital that would only keep killing him. As foolish and dangerous as this was, I found safety in Taehyung's words, even if his jokes tried to make him more brave too. I took my hand in his and as soon as I felt my fingers wrap around his, I felt safe.
"But you definitely prefer me calling you Mouse." I spoke, making him smile upon feeling my small hand barely wrap around half of his palm. "Of course I do. I told you to call me Mouse when you were pretending to hate me and all that act." He spoke, playfully rolling his eyes. "Why that tone?! You genuinely frustrated me." I loudly whispered, looking around the open streets once we started walking on them. "I only frustrated you because you were falling for my charms." He confidently said, no joking tone to be found in his voice whatsoever. "Oh, come on." I annoyingly spoke, making him giggle at my facial expression. After a few seconds of walking and a few seconds of my fingers brushing against his, I broke off the silence by speaking. "Thanks for making me laugh, Mouse. It makes me feel so much better." I spoke and shyly looked down to my feet. "Of course." He spoke in a reassuring tone and kissed my cheek as we continued to walk. I broke the silence off, this time in a comedic manner. "Now can you tell me where the fuck are we going?" I spoke, immediately hearing him chuckling because of my direct tone. He softly sighed and opened his mouth to speak, trying to find the right words. "To a place that used to be my home. Maybe we'll find someone there too." He spoke, his fingers holding tightly onto mine. "Where you and your friends used to live?" I timidly asked. "Yeah." He spoke in a slight nervous manner. "I know that one of them is there definitely. Our oldest hyung." He spoke and looked down to his feet. "Had a bad last encounter with him?" I asked, aware of the situation. He nodded and softly sighed. I stopped him for a second, turning his body towards me.
I slightly tiptoed and pressed my lips onto his to comfort him. He responded with a kiss back as his tongue playfully licked my bottom lip. I smiled and pulled away, taking a hold of his hand again. We continued walking next to each other. Taehyung immediately spoke after taking a first step. "I knew you were going to kiss me." He softly spoke, giggling to himself. I glanced at him and smiled. "Well you don't have to be a God to foresee such a thing." I said and sent him a convincing look. "Touché." He honestly spoke, shrugging the situation off.
