1.1 | Desiderium ✓

64|sixty four

JaeHwan was nervous to sit at the breakfast table with his father the next morning.

"Let's have a little talk, you and I." DanTae said. His face was clean shaven that morning and he smelt of his musky cologne. JaeHwan never knew he could be terrified of that scent.

"Yes, Abbeoji."

"Good," DanTae took a swig of water from the table, "and your CSAT score?" 

"I got listed in the top 0.1 percent," JaeHwan said. There was a feast laid out in front of him, but he didn't feel hungry. "But I won't be valedictorian." 

"I won't run around in circles. I saw your college applications in November, JaeHwan. I am impressed." DanTae kept the knife and fork down on his plate in a cross, indicating that he was done. The kitchen help, Mrs. Hong left the table and went inside, leaving father and son alone. 

"I applied for business administration. Just like we decided before." JaeHwan's hands slid down to rest on his kneecaps. 

"And? You surely look like you have more to say."

JaeHwan took a deep breath. He needed to let it out. His father was giving him a chance to speak before he spoke for the two of them. But JaeHwan didn't know where exactly he wanted to start. "I er... I don't want to leave this country."

JaeHwan heard his father take a deep breath. But he continued. "You studied from here. I can easily get into any of the SKY colleges, and —"

"Reason?"

"Yes?"

"The reason." DanTae's eyes were unreadable. "I need a specific, solid reason as to why should you just throw away all the money I spent on your education and see you end up being an average salaryman."

JaeHwan's throat went dry. But his father's words attacked his pride. "I am not wasting anything. Just reconsidering my options."

"You know, business graduates from SKY colleges beg for an internship in my company. And you want me to believe that the future head of my company would be like one of those?"

"I don't mean that," JaeHwan's hands clasped the fabric of his pants, "I merely said —"

"Is it Shin?" DanTae's eyes narrowed.

"What?"

"HwaShin. That boy. Is he the reason?"

JaeHwan couldn't lie. He couldn't lie to his father's face. But he couldn't open his mouth to speak a single word either. JaeHwan's heartbeat drowned somewhere within his sane reason. "I won't agree to be away from him. You can't do that."

DanTae pulled a long face. "What am I? An only haggly witch? Is separating young people in love my part time business?"

"No... but," JaeHwan swallowed the lump in his throat, "right now you looked like you would pay me a big wad of cash and tell me to never show my face to Shin again."

"That was the most outrageously stupid idea I have ever heard in my life." JaeHwan's father groaned and slumped back in his chair.

"If you do, I will take that money and run away." JaeHwan looked down, slightly hurt.

"That hit a nerve. Agreed. But you should understand, Hwan, I am really in a dilemma right now." DanTae leaned forward and rested his elbows on the table. Copying him, JaeHwan leaned in as well.

"What dilemma are you in?" JaeHwan scrunched his nose. "I'm discussing my love life with my father. There's nothing worse than that."

"There is," DanTae clicked his tongue, "I'm discussing the love life of my two sons. Top that."