May 2021
You know... when you have a boyfriend who is extremely shy over any affection, and just barely dares to take your hand in his, himself. You're pretty much left with initiating any affection you want, and believe me... that gets tiring with time. So now... from today on... I will be ignoring any type of urge to show Sunghoon affection, see how long it lasts before he budges in.
"How many days are you up on now?" Jake questioned as I was cooking dinner for him and I.
"We're on the third day, and I've now begun waking up with blye lips," I calmly shrugged with a small laugh.
"Are you sure you're not gonna get withdrawal symptoms or something like that?" Jake chuckled making me glance to him.
"I'm stronger than you think Shim," I hummed at him before making a serving to Jake, of the food I had cooked for us.
"Thank you," he proudly stated and grabbed the plate for himself.
"Hana~" a voice cooed out, making a small smile spread on Jake's face as Sunghoon wandered into the kitchen.
"What?" I questioned him in confusion as I made a portion for myself as well.
"Are you mad at me?" he questioned and I just shook my head at him, "are you sure?"
"Why would I be mad at you?" I questioned in amusement.
"That's what I'm trying to figure out!" he sighed as well, "you haven't hugged, kissed or show any affection to me in these past days. You even sleep in your own bed."
"I just haven't felt like it," I excused with a shrug.
"Oooh, you're about to break him," Jake cooed out at me making me glance over to Sunghoon, who visibly had trouble standing still in his place, "I don't know if I want to witness this or no."
"I'd say it'll be a special event to witness," I shrugged at him making Jake glance back at Sunghoon.
"Yeah... no I'm not staying," he immediately shook his head before rushing out with his food, making me look after him in disbeleif.
"What a traitor," I muttered before looking back to Sunghoon, "I think I might've made too much food, want some?"
"I want to know first," he shook his head making me look to him in confusion, "why won't you show affection?"
"I'm just not feeling like it," I shrugged once more making him sigh before walking over and standing in front of me.
"Tell me," he urged before hesitantly reaching out and grabbing my hand, "did I do something?"
"You really didn't," I shook my head in assurance.
"Then why are you no longer giving me hugs or kisses... or sleep in my bed?" he questioned with a sad look on his face.
"Then may I ask a question?" I asked and he immediately nodded at me, "in these past days, have any of us gotten a kiss or a hug from the other?"
"No," he shook his head at me.
"And why is that?"
"Because you... ah... I see," he muttered and I just nodded at him, "so it's actually not because you don't want to kiss or hug me, it's because you don't always want to be the one."
"You haven't initiated affection once, since I forgave you about what you did back in February," I simply shook my head, "and I miss that confidence... and feeling that I actually was loved back."
"But I do love you," he reminded and I just nodded at him.
"Then maybe just... initiate affection just once in a while. Just... what you're comfortable with," I pointed out to him, "is it too much to ask for? Or is it because you're just not confindent or comfortable?"
"I'm sorry..." I just thought... I don't think I realized you needed affection as well," he admitted and I just hummed at him before he let out a deep sigh and just pulled me into a hug, "I'll remember to shower you with love from now on."
"No..." I muttered and softly patted his back, "don't force yourself... I was just trying to prove my point that I always was the one initiating affection," I shook my head at him and tried to pull away from him, before he just held me tight into him, "Sunghoon..."
"No," he shook his head against my shoulder.
"No?" I questioned in amusement.
"It's Hoonie," he corrected making me let out a small laugh at him, "and I'm gonna pull myself together and kiss you everytime I get the urge."
"You actually get the urge to kiss me?" I chuckled at him making him pull his head back and look down at me with an offended look.
"Excuse me? Who initiated the first kiss?" he questioned me.
"As far as I remember I didn't have any escape route," I reminded himw ith a small smirk.
"All part of my plan," he hummed at me, "you have no idea how much courage that kiss took."
"And now you're actually my boyfriend, so you don't have to gather that much courage," I reminded him, "you probably had more courage back in I-Land than you do now... now that I think about it... it's almost like we switched roles after ending the show... seriously what happened?"
"I realized I was in love and got shy," he simply shrugged.
"Ah..." I hesitantly nodded, "and I realized I was in love and got confident."
"Sounds propable," he nodded at me, "so? Do you want a kiss?"
"Please," I nodded at him making him let out a small laugh before sofly cupping my face and placing a small kiss on my lips.
"Happy?" he questioned and I just nodded again, "want another one?"
"Of course," I hummed making him grin once again. He quickly leaned down and pressed another kiss to my lips, letting it last a bit longer this time.
"Now... will you please just sleep in my bed again? Your lips are all purple in the morning," he reminded and I just nodded at him.
"Make space for me tonight, Icey," I patted his chest softly, "now... you wanted food?"
"Is it good?" he questioned making me glance up at him.
"I cooked it," I pointed out to him.
"Eh... I'll pass then," he stated making me gasp, "I'm kidding! I'm kidding!" he quickly assured and pecked my cheek.
"I was this close to just chop your hand off," I warned him as I pinched two fingers together.
"You wouldn't," he simply shook his head at me, "you're not good at the sight of other's blood."
"I hate that you're right," I hissed at him making him just grin in victory before wrapping his arms around my waist and stand behind me as he watched me ready a portion for him.

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Catch Me (P.Sh) [Sequel]
FanfictionAfter months of isolation, fighting for their debut. They finally reach their dream of debut, when old faces appear once again. Potentially ruining everything? This is a sequel to my book "Fly With Me". --- "I can forgive myself for doing it once, b...