Losing Love • Malec

Chapter 27

Magnus finished explaining everything and watched as the Inquisitor's face went from shocked, to disbelieving, to dumbfounded.

"No," the Inquisitor said. "You're lying. There's no spell to remove love."

Magnus couldn't believe it. He had just told this whole long story and he didn't believe him, really? "See for yourself." He said, handing him the spell.

"I can't read this! How do I know you're not lying?" He hissed, throwing the spell back at Magnus. Magnus grabbed it and slid it into his pocket.

"He's not lying, Dad." Maryln said.

"How would you know?!"

"Did you see the look on Alec's face? They're not lying. I can tell. Did you not here how real Magnus' story was?"

"Magnus? Magnus? You support this gay piece of downworlder trash?" The Inquisitor was furious. And it was at that moment Magnus decided to chip in and correct him.

"Freewheeling bisexual, actually." He said.

The Inquisitor glared at him. "Do I look like I care?" He shouted, obviously wanting to get back to yelling at his daughter.

Magnus put his hands up in mock surrender. "Whatever. Just thought you might be wondering. You look like you need to talk to Maryln, I'll be outside with Alec." And before the Inquisitor could protest, Magnus slid out into the hall and closed the door behind him.

Magnus saw Alec leaning against the wall. He had is eyes closed, and beside him on the floor was the letter from Kara and Ben. Magnus could also see some tear stains on his cheeks. His heart suddenly felt a pang, and Magnus sat down beside Alec.

"Alexander..." He whispered.

Alec's eyes flew open, and he looked over at Magnus, immediately launching into a speech. "You've got to do it Magnus. You've got to turn me in. Please. I have to help Jace, he's my parabatai...I took an oath. You have to perform the spell-"

"I don't have to do anything." Magnus said. "I'm not losing you again." He reached over and grabbed Alec's hand. It was warm beneath his touch, and sweaty, as if he was nervous about his choice. Which, considering the options he had been given, it seemed likely.

"Magnus...I-I have to. I have to help Jace. I don't want to leave you...I don't want to forget you. But you have to do the spell, so I can save Jace." Alec felt tears about to push themselves out of his eyelids...but he willed them not to fall. That would only make this harder.

"You don't have to do anything! I don't have to do anything!" Magnus shouted, trying to help Alec see that he didn't need to give up love. He didn't need to forget Magnus.

"Then what about Jace? He'll die! Do you want him to die Magnus?" Alec shouted back, his voice rising.

"Of course I don't want him to die!" Magnus shouted, standing up. Alec looked up at him, anger written clearly across his face, and stood up too. "How do you know they're not lying!?" Magnus shouted. "Maybe Jace can be saved by the Silent Brothers! We haven't even tried that yet!"

"Well wonder if he can't, then what? Then he dies. He dies! And it will be all my fault! Because I didn't do anything to help him. Becuase you," Alec poked Magnus in the chest harshly. "Didn't do anything to help him!"

"I'm not going to let you do this, Alec!" Magnus shouted. "I'm not going to let you lose love! And it's all up to me anyway, isn't it? You can't get the spell performed unless I do it. So I don't do it, no spell for you."

"And Jace dies." Alec spits. "I see how it is. You don't care about anything I care about. You don't care if Jace dies because he doesn't matter to you. But he matters to me."

"I do care about Jace-"

"Don't lie, Magnus, I thought we decided not to lie to each other." Alec spat, all of his anger seeping into his words. Minutes ago all he wanted was for Magnus to hold him and make it all okay, but now he wanted to yell at Magnus. He wanted to make him see that this was something Alec had to do.

"I do care about Jace, okay? But I care about him because you care about him! And I care about you more. And I can not, will not, perform this spell on you."

Alec closed his eyes tightly, and sighed as if he was giving up. Giving up on Magnus. "No. I should have known. You're just like the rest. You only care about yourself, makes sense though, since you're just a warlock."

Alec's words dug deep into Magnus. They stabbed his heart like a needle. Magnus was just like the others. Magnus didn't care about anyone. Magnus was just a warlock. And the worst thing is, Alec had spat it like a curse, like it was the worst thing someone could be. A warlock.

"Well you're not the best person either, Mr. Alec Lightwood. You're just like all the rest of the self-centered Shadowhunters thinking downworlders are here to obey them. I mean look! You wanted to ask me to do this spell, and I don't want to do it! You think you're sooo much better than me, don't you Alec?"

Magnus stepped forward, his eyes cold and dark, and Alec stepped back. He knew he shouldn't have said that...but here was Magnus. Insulting him. Just calling him Alec. Not Alexander, Alec. And that hurt Alec more than he let on.

"Well you're not!" Magnus shouted. "You're just another lazy shadowhunter boy like all the rest! So why don't you just accept it?! I. Won't. Do. The. Spell. Not for you, not for anyone. I'm not your pet warlock anymore."

Alec felt the tears coming now. If the letter hadn't made him cry a lot, this was going to. Alec squeezed his eyes shut again and turned away from Magnus. "Fine then." He said, his voice cracking.

It was like something broke inside of Magnus, and he realized what he had said. "Oh God, Alec...I didn't mean that. It j-just-"

"Slipped out, didn't it?" Alec's voice was a hoarse whisper. Magnus reached out as if to comfort him, but Alec stepped away, then turned back around.

"Be whoever you want to be Magnus. You don't have to listen to me. I'll do find someone else to do the spell, to help Jace. And then-" Alec's tears were falling. Big and heavy and obnouxius. "I'll forget what it means to love."

"Alec...Alec no."

"I have to." Alec muttered his last words before turning back around and running off down the hall.

He ran away from Magnus, who wouldn't help him. He ran away from the Inquisitor, who hated him. He ran away from his family, who could do nothing from Jace. He ran towards a solution, the only solution, so he could lose his heart but save his brother's.