High School Au- Bungou Stray Dogs AU

eat.

TW: e*ting d*soders, s*lf h*rm mentions and urges, child neglect, abuse

Dazais P.O.V.

The next few weeks go by like normal. I almost re lapsed a few times but atsushi stopped me. I'm honestly still more worried about him. He eats yeah but it's barely enough. And he's obviously ignoring his own problems for me...I keep telling him not to but he does anyway.

After we get home from school he goes straight to his room and I follow him. "Atsushi are you alright...im ushally the one dragging you in here first thing-" "if I said I was okay would you even belive me?" "...no not really" "yeah- im..." he gets quite. "Have you eaten anything today?" "Well...thats the thing...yes but no" "what do you mean yes but no?" "Nothing- yeah. I ate don't worry about me. Go focus on yourself. Your problems are more important anyway" "no. Your important to atsushi." "...I'll eat when I'm literally about to starve to death..." "so you didn't eat yet did you...?" "I..I did..just.." "just what?" "I made myself throw it all up in the bathroom when you wernt around..." "Atsu- you can't do that. That isn't healthy you need to eat!?!" "IM TRYING" "...cmon I'm getting you food. Right now. Get up your gonna go eat." "No no no no no no no-" "yes."

After I force him to eat and we go back upstairs we just sob into each other's shoulders. I really wish I'd seen how bad he is towards himself sooner... "dazai..." "yes?" "Im...I don't know. I'm sorry I make you worry about me you need to help yourself get better not me..." "if that's your logic then you shouldn't help me etheir" "BUT- but you actually need help." "So do you!?!" He stays quite and burries his head in my arm. "Ssshhh your gonna be alright" I just hear muffled sobs in response.

After a while of crying atsushi just gets up. "Atsu?" "I think my parents forgot about me....they never stay gone for this long and I know they're still alive. I mean- it let's you guys stay here and I'm glad it just...hurts...to know all they've ever done is abuse me and then forget I even exist." I hug him. A tight hug. And I start running my hands through his hair. "Then they're assholes. You don't need their abuse in your life anyways...I don't understand how someone could forget you though...your such an amazing and sweet person" he looks at me with glossed over eyes. "Th-thank you dazy...so so much..." "of course. You've helped me through so much. I wanna help you to"