Captivated

Ashley-Chapter Thirteen

We drove for hours and hours. It was starting to turn to dusk when we finally turned off the highway. We drove through back roads and into the sunset. I fell asleep in the car for I don't even know how long. But when I woke up, we were still driving.

"We are almost there." I heard Zayn say.

I didn't say anything. I didn't want to go home.

"Ashley, please say something." He said, begging me.

"I don't know what to say," I confessed.

Zayn quickly turned his head to study my face, then looked back to the road.

"You've been crying." He analyzed.

I reached up to touch my face and it turns out my eyes were wet. I must have been crying while I was sleeping.

"Why are you crying?" He asked.

"Because I'm leaving you," I told him.

"It's for the best." He repeated.

"You keep saying that but I don't believe it. How can this be for the best Zay\? You said you wanted me. I don't understand." I threw my hands up in the air and huffed.

"It's too complicated for you to understand."

"Try me." I looked him dead in the eyes with no emotion.

"I told you, Ashley, I'm not the one you want."

"You don't know what I want Zayn," I told him.

"I know you need someone else. Someone who isn't as complicated as me. I have secrets, Ashley. I don't want you to know them. You can't." He just kept driving.

"Why can't I?" I asked.

He didn't answer back right away. He kept his brown eyes with his long eyelashes on the road.

"Because. Because once you know them, you'll never look at me the same again."

"Zayn," I turned my body so I was facing him, "I think I made it very clear that whatever you do, you can't push me away. I don't care what your secrets are. I just don't want to be apart from you. Whatever you say, nothing will change the way I feel about you."

He looked at me then swerved the car off the road. He parked it off into the dirt. The only thing we could hear was the crickets outside. It was dark now and I could barely see him in the car. He reached up and clicked on the light above our heads.

"Zayn, what are you doing?" I was freaked out. This came out of nowhere.

"Promise me that what I am about to tell you will stay between us." He looked me right in the eyes. Like he was pleading me.

I took his hands in mine. "Zayn, I have no one to tell."

He let go of a breath that I had no clue he was holding in. "When I was young," he started. "I got abused by my mother. She hit me and put cigarettes out on my skin. It haunts me every day. All I can remember is how it felt. What she did. How I felt abused and how sad and angry I felt. I wanted revenge. I wanted others to feel what I felt. To experience what I did. I know that it's messed up." He looked down at our hands that were intertwined between us. "I'm messed up." He whispered.

I didn't know what to say. I was sad that he got abused at such a young age. But most of all I was pissed that this sick and twisted woman would do that to such a young child. It made my stomach turn.

"Zayn," I lifted my hand that was not holding his and stroked the side of his face. "I'm so sorry this happened to you. But you're not messed up. It's okay to want revenge. I just think you went about it the wrong way." I told him truthfully.