𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝗮𝘃𝗶𝗼𝗿⁴ // 𝘑𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘏𝘰𝘴𝘴𝘭𝘦𝘳

chapter 20

"I'm so sorry for your loss."
I nodded pulling away where I was met with hugs from all of them, all of them saying basically same things and also doing that to everyone.
They all sat down, and then doors buzzed again.
Bryce again typed the pin until front doors opened again.
Cooper, Sabrina and Daniel walked in.
Sabrina hugged me tight. I'm sure honestly that most of them was there last night probably, but yesterday was so fucking messy day. And they just came for support, and I appreciate it.
"I'm really sorry Lex. I'll miss him so much."
Daniel whispered to me when he hugged me. He's now 21 years old (A/N I'm not so sure, I think it he should be that age now, I'm too lazy to check) and he's big grown man now and I can say really beautiful. He always loved Jaden, from the day we met. I remember for his 16th birthday Jaden bought him a car. Well we but it was what Jaden wanted to do. Sure Cooper and Sabrina would probably buy him, but Jaden just wanted to do it.

"Happy birthday big man!"
Jaden said fist bumping when we walked into their house.
"Happy birthday buddy!"
I hugged him while he smiled. I think he really loves us, probably because of the way we met and all that stuff.
"Thank you guys!"
He said when kids hugged him and wished him happy birthday.
"Wow you are sixteen now, you can drive a car huh?"
"Yeah, when I get my license."
"What, didn't you say you have test next month or something?"
"Yeah, most likely."
We walked in saying 'hi' to everyone there.
-
"Time for your present."
Jaden said getting Daniel's attention.
"You really didn't have to do anything."
"Oh, shut up and, Sab, can you just get me something to put over his eyes?"
She quickly nodded and got up and handed him. Jaden was probably hyped up more than Daniel.
Jaden led him out of the house and everyone followed after.
You could clearly see the shock on Cooper's and Sabrina's face.
"Okay, are you ready?"
"Y-yeah."
"You can take it off."
Daniel took down the cover off his eyes. He gasped as his eyes widened.
"No damn way!"
"Did we get the right one?"
"Dude this is my dream car! Shut up!"
He jumped on the Jaden and me and hugged us.
"Thank you guys so much!"
"Of course!"
"Here's the key of YOUR new car."
He quickly unlocked the car and sat in.
"Oh my God this is so awesome!"
"Is it safe if you go on a ride now? Are you a good driver?"
Daniel looked and Sabrina and Cooper and they nodded their heads.
"Who's going to go with me?"
"I'm not that sure if I wanna sit it the car you never drove before without license."
"Let's go."
Jaden sat in with Daniel and slowly they drove off.

He was always the guy to try to make others happy.
He walked to everyone else and then we were all sitting in the living room talking.
More people arrived later on, including Steve - my uncle - and our close friends.
"Why don't you go upstairs now? It's getting too loud for you guys here."
I asked Michael cupping his face. He just nodded, getting all the kids and walking upstairs.
It was just day filled with a lot of people in our house when I didn't wanted it. I just wanted to be alone. But I do understand why all them came and I appreciate it. But I'm just not in the mood for talking.

"Where's Bryce?"
I asked John when I noticed that Bryce is nowhere in the house.
"He took Josie on a ride. The others didn't wanna go."
"Oh, okay."
I turned around to go somewhere else, but he stopped me, turning me around by my hand.
He just squeezed my upper arm with simpathetic smile on his face. I gave him one to, before walking away. Men like men, especially in this fucking business we're in, they don't show emotions as much. So he is putting it up really good so far, even though I did saw him cry last night, a lot.
Maybe I should check up on kids?
I walked upstairs. They were all in Michael's room as expected, on their phones. And I understand them, I did that too. And I don't even know what I think about mobile phones anymore. It's same thing like when I was teenager. It helped me a lot, but it was also the reason of many bad things; me searching up how many pills do I need to swallow, being interested in many things so searching up many things and thinking I have them too when it's not that big of a deal, dissociating from everyone and losing friends because I'd rather be in the home on the phone than get ready and go out, and so much many things. But it helped in many ways too: music as a therapy, watching TV shows and YouTube too, games, using apps to get my anxiety calm down, talking to therapist through the phone, also meeting a lot of people, also educating myself on a lot of things that I was interested in.
So I don't blame them, I get it that they don't want to talk right now.
"Do you guys wanna eat something or drink, did you bring anything here?"
"Yeah, uncle Bry got us some food and soda and stuff."
"Oh, okay, do you want me to bring anything else?"
"It's okay."
"Okay."
"When are all these people going to go? I mean, it's nice from them, but it would be better if we were alone."
"I know, but I don't know. They are here to support us and they loved Jaden."
"I know, I know."
I kissed the top of Mason's head and hugged Michael while Sitting next to Eva and Mason. They were playing a game on iPad.
"What are you playing?"
"Just cars."
"Ouu."

"Hey guys."
"Hi."
Josie sat on the bed while Bryce stood in the middle of the room.
"Where were you guys?"
"I showed her a place."
"What place?"
"Where dad would go when he needed to clear his mind."
"Ooh, that one. Yeah, he really loved that place. And did it work for you guys too?"
Josie nodded her head, pulling her legs to her chest.
"You guys all should get ready for bed. Tomorrow is funeral and it's going to be a long day for everyone. People already started leaving so."
"Okay."

Kids all walked to their rooms and I went to mine, but my doors weren't fully closed. I just came here to take a breath before going downstairs.
My hands on the back of my neck, my head down as I exhaled loudly.
Someone turned me around, but I know the scent.
I hugged him tight while trying to hold in my tears.
"Do it."
He just whispered, and it was enough for me to break down. I can't believe he knows me that well. Not that he was husband of my sister-in-law, but he was my best friend and brother. He might seem as loud and violent person that likes to drinks and smokes, but he is such a genuine person and a sweetheart when you meet him, but he also really likes to drinks and smokes.
He slowly walked me backwards until I felt back of my legs hit the bed and he slowly sat me down and sat next to me.
"Get it out. Don't hold in. This is hard moment and you can be vulnerable, okay?"
I shook my head while he held me tight.
"I know it's hard, it's hard for me too."
I noticed he is crying too. He's been holding it in too.
"I-I ju-st miss h-him so m-much. I-I'm waiting for him t-to walk in and says that it's a prank. I feel like he is on work and he'll come back home any second. He isn't dead. He can't be dead."
"I know it's a huge shock. We probably never will be able to actually realize that. But life is not stopping because he's dead now."
"I know Bry."
"We are over the street, I'm taking the time off the job, we can stay here with you guys or leave to our house in few days. However you want it, I'm here anyways."

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I feel vulnerable writing this😭
words count: 1439