random stuff, personal notes, etc.

i wanna get out of here

may 20th, 2021, around 20.15 pm

i just finished my english hw lmao-

please my teeth hurt sm omg

i have small rubber rings between my teeth (dw my dentist put it in GDHSYGD) for my braces, i get it tmr bsdhdjsb

i already had those thingys a few times in my mouth, but it never hurted that much omg

i wanna rip them out omg

anygays

today i had my physics exam

and i passed :D

it went pretty well actually

i mean i was so nervous bcs i had to sit like, in front of my teacher, which is reaaaaally scary, but i did it :D

yeah i think that was like the only positive thing that happened today

what am i even doing here

this whole thing is just useless

everything is just useless

u live just to die some day

why would there be a reason to be alive if there are billions of other people out there

life is really just unfair

and shitty

and just useless in general

it's not even our choice if we want to be born or not

and then, when you are born, everything just gets worse

ofc there are many happy moments in your life

but lets be realistic

its just cruel

you are born, you have 10-12 years of a childhood (sometimes less, depends on each person)

you go to school

thats where the horror story usually begins

u get stressed, everybody has expectations, you just have to deal with so much, and that for at least 10 years

and it gets worse every year

and then, after you finish school?

you go search a job

because you need money for living

you move out of your parents home, maybe travel or smth, and then go to work every day

after a few years you maybe have a family, maybe not, doesnt matter

if you have a family, you probably have 1 or more children, which means you make them go through the same horror story

then you get old, stop working and eventually just die

life is short

time is weird

some people live rich

some people live poor

but you have to work almost every day of your life

starting at primary school

ending when you are not able to work anymore

is that fair?

is that a reason to live?

i dont think so tbh

bye omg i dozed off for almost 5 minutes what the fuck-

egal

thats actually not what i wanted to write here what the hell happened omg wtf

egal-

to make it short, i'm at the verge of tears the whole time, i feel nothing the whole, it's like a gray day or smth for me today idk and my whole family is making everything worse

and i thought today was actually pretty okay for a thursday ._.

egal

i'm gonna go shopping on saturday ueeeee

imma go now, i feel like throwing up ;-;

bYeEeEeEeE- wait omg holy shit its 20.40 pm WHAT THE FUCK-