The Way It Ends

39. Trust

I didn't proof read this because I can't be bothered. So if there's any mistakes ( which there is probably) ignore it, I'll check it later or just tell me in the comments and I'll correct it!!

Derek laid in bed half naked trying to go to sleep. But his own words kept playing in his head. How could he possibly say such horrible things to her? It's not like he meant any of it. He was just so mad. He gave her his heart. Told everyone he loved her in front of the hospital and then she tells him he's suffocating him.

"You!" Derek shouted to make sure she hears him, "It's you, it's fucking you. I can not describe it anymore, it is you. You are the only one I will ever want. I belong with you. You are my home. I look at you, and somehow I can see 50 years from now on the front porch of some old house in the middle of nowhere and we're together. I need you. You are the only thing that matters. You are my good. When I say I want to date, I don't mean to date you to just pass time. I want to date you because I want to marry you, I want to build with you, grow with you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. From the day you walked into my life, you're all I think about. You're the reason I breathe. You're the stars in my sky. I wouldn't want it any other way. You're the love of my life Meredith, don't you see?"

A tear fell down his cheeks. After everything they've been through, everything she told him, he still loved her. He was head over heels for her. And he couldn't breathe. He couldn't breathe with her looking at him like he killed her mother.

"As you wish," he agreed. Meredith closed her eyes ready for her to die. Before Ellis could say anything, Anpu pulled the trigger, a small bullet leaving the gun heading straight for Meredith's heart. The bullet was inches away from her chest, when all of a sudden Derek came out of nowhere, making the bullet hit her mother instead. Meredith fell to the ground, not knowing what just happened. She saw Ellis dropp to her knees, holding her chest in pain, blood flowing through her fingers.
"MUM!" She cried out loud. "NO!" She screamed from the top of her lungs almost loosing her voice. "LET ME GO," She tried to get out from under Derek's grip but she wasn't strong enough. "DEREK PLEASE! LET ME GO," she punched his chest trying to break free. Finally she let go and just cried in his arms. How was this real? How was this life? This is not how her mother was supposed to die.

Derek closed his eyes by the memory. He wished he could go back to that time. Before everything else happened. To be close to her. Hold her against his bare chest and listen to her breathe. Oh he would give anything to hear that little snore again. He smiled for the first time. But it dropped immediately. The words 'you're suffocating me' ran through his mind. It was all just so hard to digest. Till this day he can't believe she told him that. It made him so angry. After everything he's done for her. All he did was love her and cherish her. He stirred out of his thoughts as he heard someone knocking on the door. He really really felt bad for the person on the other side because whoever it was they were going to get shouted at because his blood was boiling. The door opened and in front of him stood Meredith. The last person he wanted to see.
"I'm moving to England," Meredith blurted.

She has no idea how and why she came here. Out of everyone Derek was the last person she wanted to tell. Derek didn't even listen. He told himself, whatever came out of her mouth he didn't care, "Tell it to someone who cares," he rolled his eyes and shut the trailer door in her face. Tears were rolling down her cheeks like a river. She couldn't figure this man out. First he tells her he wants to be someone she can confide in and when she does he's a total asshole. Meredith bit down on her lip holding back her whimpers and nodded before walking back to her car. All of a sudden the door slammed open, "ENGLAND?!" Derek came to his senses, "FUCKING ENGLAND?" He ran after her and turned her around, "You can't move to England," he shook his head. He will not see her again, ever. He couldn't live like that. She was the reason he woke up everyday.
"There's nothing stopping me. It's not like anyone would care," her voice sounded calm and quite. She was heartbroken.
"I! ME! I WOULD CARE! I would care very much," he pointed at his chest, "You have you're whole life here. Your friends. What about Cristina?" He asked. Anything just to keep her here.
"She'll live. My mother died. My father doesn't bother to reach out. I have no reason to stay here," her body started shaking as she held back her tears. Her lips trembled underneath her teeth. Derek couldn't say anything. She would never stay here for him. "Unless you could give me a reason to stay," she muttered. Derek let go of her arms for the first time. He got lost in those emerald green gateways for a second.
"Derek," she whispered all her emotions showing in her eyes. The love, the hatred, the sadness, the fear. Derek moved in closer. His eyes darkened as he moved down to her lips to mingle with his. Sliding his tongue over her bottom lip before sucking on it lightly. She arched her head back as she wrapped her hand around his neck, pulling him down closer. She surrenders as she opens her mouth letting his tongue delve in her mouth. A soft moan escaping from her throat. A tingling feeling that she felt all the way to her toes. His tongue explores the soft contours of her mouth as his teeth nibbles on her lips.
"Hmm oh god Derek," she whimpers against his mouth. Sliding her hand down to his chest and pressing against it. Another surrendering sound leaves her mouth, making him hotter. She's breathless. The way she missed his soft lips. That adrenaline she gets from his hands brushing through her hair. He slowly pulls away both of their eyes still closed. "Derek please... don't stop," she scratched the nape of his neck.
"This is wrong," he whispered, his hand resting on her waist, their foreheads leaned against each other. "I'm taking advantage," he told her before letting go.
"Why do you always do this?" She shouted after him as he left her there standing, "we get close and you run! Why?" He could hear her voice crack. He stopped. He turned around and ran full speed at her making her step back a little, "Because I was told I make you suffocate!" He shouted in a low voice, "I was told I make your life miserable and hard," he pointed his finger at her, "Do you know what that did to me? I can't sleep, I can't eat, I- I can't think," he slapped his hand on her side, "And you're making it very difficult for me to stay away from you," a tear dropped down his cheeks.
"I was wrong," she took a step forward, "I thought you were the one but it wasn't you. Because I'm here in front of you and all I can do is breathe. I feel like I finally have enough oxygen in my lungs. You're the reason I breathe Derek. The reason I came here was because the thought of not seeing you everyday made me not want to go. And with all the hope that I have left inside of me, I hoped that you felt the same way," her lips trembled as she waited for him to answer. Derek stood there muddled. Out of every word from the dictionary these are the last three words he should've said, "What about Tom," he asked.
"GOD could you for once forget about him," she held her hands in a fist, "I love you. I. Love. You," she made sure he understands. Derek moved towards her and picked her up on his waist. Meredith cupped his face and giggled as he twirled them around. "Am I a good enough reason for you to stay?" He asked with a huge grin on his face. Meredith didn't answer. That smile catches his breath. It goes right to his core, making him feel hot and tingly again. He walks her to the trailer as Meredith leans in to kiss him. Her mouth is warm and demanding, parting his lips for her tongue to slide in. He eased them down on the bed, making Meredith fall in his lap. She felt his cock being hard and hot between them. She placed her hands on him making him moan as he closed his eyes. He could barely think straight. She left trails of kisses along his lips and neck, laying him down as she straddled him. "I need you bad Mer, right now..."