The Way It Ends

42. Best for you

Meredith hasn't been herself these past few days. Apparently she has stopped seeing her therapist and that wasn't good for their relationship. Her nightmares increased and Derek didn't know what to do. She told him it was nothing and she's getting better. But he didn't believe her, no one could believe her. Derek started to think everything was finally hitting her. The three months, the little fiasco that happened back the bunk, everything coming back to her all of a sudden. If he really thought about it, she never processed any of it. When Derek found her, he got shot which made her worry about him, rather than herself. Then she worried about her hours at the hospital. She was worrying about Derek's mental health, which made him fill with guilt. Time has passed so fast it almost felt embarrassing to still be hurting. But there she was roaming the halls of the hospital lifeless and there was nothing anyone could do. She was talking more to Derek but still wouldn't let him in. Not because she didn't trust him, because she didn't want to burden him with this.

"Good Morning Dr Grey," Derek came up behind her in the line at the coffee cart, whispering into her ear. She jumped a little at the sudden touch of his breath but smiled immediately, "Good Morning to you too handsome," she turned around, wrapping her hands around his neck and kissing him softly.
"Ugh get a room," Cristina came passing by.
"Morning Yang," Derek pulled away, licking his lips, still tasting Meredith on him. "Hi Cristina," Meredith giggled.
"You seem chirpy," Cristina turned to Meredith whilst glancing at Derek a few times.
"Why wouldn't I be?" Meredith asked confused.
"I just, you weren't yourself lately," Cristina told her frankly.
"I have no idea what you're talking about," Meredith shrugged her shoulders and turned back around to move forward in the line. Cristina gave Derek a stern look, asking him what's going on. Derek just shook his head not knowing what to say. He was just as clueless as she was. "You need to talk to her," Cristina whispered into his ear.
"Don't you thing I tried?" Derek replied quietly.
"Try harder," Cristina commanded.
"I am!" Derek said out loud making Meredith turn around. "You're what?" She asked smiling.  Derek looked at her surprised having no idea what to say to her, "I am... with you... I'm with you and only you," he smirked at her and came in close to her, wrapping his arm around her waist. "You're weird," she raised her eyebrows out him but leaned into his chest anyway. "And I'm out of here," Cristina cringed at the both of them and let them be.

"Hey so I've been meaning to talk to you about something," Derek told her as they left the cart with their coffees.
"Derek, I told you, I'm fine," she rolled her eyes.
"Meredith you're not fine. Matter of fact you are far from fine. You're quite the opposite of fine. I just want what's best for you, you know that," he stepped in front of her and cupped her cheeks. "I know," she leaned into his touch, "But I'm fine," she told him frankly.
"You've said that word so many times it doesn't even sound like a word anymore," he chuckled making her giggle along with him, "Mer please, I'm just looking out for you," they lost themselves in each others eyes before Meredith replied softly, "okay." Derek was beaming with happiness as he heard the word and took a sip of his coffee, "Okay, we'll go to our trailer to have some peace and quite. I'll cook you dinner and we'll talk." Meredith was shocked a little. He said our trailer. And he said so naturally. "Our trailer?" She asked raising her eyebrows. Derek looked at her not even realising what he said, "Well of course. We live together. It's rational enough to call it our trailer," he kissed her cheeks and left to check on a patient. Meredith thought about it for minute. Meredith was left there standing confused before someone paged, making her freak out about it later.

"Hey Meredith!" Izzy came up to her later that day.
"Hi Izz," she said said walking into the lounge to get changed.
"You up for Joes tonight?" Izzy asked. She hasn't been hanging out with her lately and quite frankly she missed Meredith. They weren't close like her and Cristina but she liked to think they have some kind of friendship, "I would love to but I promised Derek I'd spend the night with him. He's cooking me dinner," she smiled in a way of making Izzy jealous. "Oh how fancy," Izzy nudged her on the side, "next time then?" She asked.
"Yes, definitely," Meredith nodded.
"But you're okay though right?" Izzy said ou if nowhere as they were changing.
"I'm perfectly fine," Meredith lied. She had enough of people asking her if she's fine. She never understood why people had to be in her business.
"Meredith fine or normal fine?" Izzy joked a little.
"Meredith fine?" Meredith chuckled at her comment.
"Where you say you're fine but really you're dying from the inside out," Izzy explained.
"I'm normal fine," Meredith rolled her eyes as she tied her shoes.
"Somehow I don't believe you," Izzy stood up ready to leave while waiting for Meredith to finish.
"I don't know what to tell you, because really... I'm fine," Meredith took out her jacket and headed for the door. Izzy followed, deciding to drop the topic.