What they don't know

Chapter 37

Erin: Morning!
Jay: Morning, what's wrong?
Erin: I think I want to see bunny, but one on one first. I don't want our kids getting their hopes up either.
Jay: Well, we can move at our own pace. Take things slow and when your ready to introduce her to the kids I will be right there to support you.
Erin: Thank you, you always know what to say.
Jay: I think we just have the ability to know each other very well. When do you wanna sit down and talk to her?
Erin: This afternoon, I wanted it to be last minute kinda thing. You know so she doesn't have time to clean herself, I just want to walk up and see her.
Jay: I know you want to fully believe everything is fine, so please baby guard your heart. I know what bunny has done in the past, but also walk in with and open mind and forgiving heart.
Erin: You should be a shrink, since you got all of this great advice!
Jay: Well I do have a great doctor, but I do have an incredible wife that always gives me great advice too.
Erin: Your wife does sounds like an incredible woman, but I'm going to go change and pump for Drew and then head out.
Jay: okay!

Erin left the living room to head to their bedroom to change. After she changed she pumped some extra milk for Drew.  Once she was done she put the milk in the fridge and left. She sent a text to Hank informing him that she was gonna go see bunny, and that Jay has the kids. She put the address into the maps and headed bunny's way. After driving for about 20 minutes she finally arrived at a office building. It was a office for recovering addicts, the place seemed legit. Erin got out of her car and walked into the building, there was a few counselors and patients in the hallway and the waiting room. She walked over to the front desk and asked the receptionist had she seen Barbara Fletcher, and to Erin's surprise she did. She had said Bunny was talking with another recovering addict, and that she should be out in a few minutes. Erin sat in the waiting area until Bunny walked out of one of the rooms.

Bunny: Hey Erin, it's really nice to see you. What brings you here?
Erin: You told Jay you wanted to speak with me.
Bunny: Yes, I did! I wanted to make amends with you. I'm done for the day would you like to grab some lunch and we could talk?
Erin: Umm... sure I would like that. Do you have a ride or do I need to give you one.
Bunny: I usually just take the bus, or call an Uber.
Erin: I can give you a ride, and we can go to the diner not to far from here.
Bunny: Thank you! So, how have you been?
Erin: I've been doing pretty good.
Bunny: That's great, how are the kids and Jay doing?
Erin: The kids are doing great, and Jay he's doing much better.
Bunny: I heard what happened with Jay, I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that alone.
Erin: it's behind us now, we can only move forward and adjust.
Bunny: We can continue talking in the dinner.

As they arrived at the dinner, Erin kept her guards up. Jay voice kept replaying in her head " guard your heart, have an open mind and a forgiving heart". That's what she did, they both sat down and ordered some food and continued to talk.

Bunny: So I wanted to make amends with, I reached the point in my recovery where I had to take responsibility for all the wrongs I wrote. I blamed you for so much, and I hurt you so bad especially as a little girl. I was suppose to protect you from all of those people but instead I allowed them to hurt you. I should've put you first, and I am so sorry for that. I put you in impossible positions at such a young age, back then I didn't treat you as a mother should've treated her child and I'm also sorry for that to. Most importantly I'm sorry for dragging you down with me, and taking advantage of your kindness. I know this doesn't make up for the 30 years of hell I put you through, but I'm hoping we can start fresh and at a good pace for you.
Erin: I know this sounds crazy but when I came here today, I had planned to cut you completely from my life. The one person who has always told me to watch out from you told me I should walk in here guarding my heart.
Bunny: I understand, Hank is trying to protect you.
Erin: It wasn't Hank it was Jay, but he also said walk in here with an open mind and a forgiving heart.
Bunny: Jay said that?
Erin: Yea, my husband knows me very well, and he hates to see me and our kids get hurt. I've put you first so many times in my life that I literally left no room for myself. I pushed the man of my dreams away just so I could spare you. So when he told me to have a forgiving hurt, I knew I had to speak my peace with you too. I forgive you, I can't allow my past with you to keep hurting me so I forgive you. I know it was hard for you to admit a lot of those things to me. The same goes for me, in order for me to heal and move pass this I have to forgive you and myself. This day will be our fresh start, no more looking back in the past just moving forward from now on.
Bunny: Thank you so much for this.
Erin: You can thank Jay, that man has changed my world. Hank also said you've been clean a little over a year.
Bunny: Yea, at first when Hank dropped me off, he told me he would talk to you. I agreed to go to rehab so I could finally see you and the kids, but Hank told me that I needed to do this for me and not for you. As I started working the steps I finally realized what Hank was talking about. When I was just doing the rehab for you, I wasn't getting the full extent of the treatment. Then I started working the program for me and I could really see the changes it was making on my life. I'm happy the Hank encouraged me to wanna be better, not just for you but for myself also.
Erin: I'm really proud of you!
Bunny: Enough about me, so the last time I seen the kids I believe it was your little girls birthday party.
Erin: yea, that's Isabella , but we call her Bella. She Will be 5, and I also had a little boy that year his name is Maverick but we call him Mav and he's almost 3.
Bunny: So you have 2 kids, that's amazing.
Erin: No I actually have 3 kids, I have a baby boy named Drew, he's only a few months old. I was pregnant with him when everything happened with Jay. Drew was just my sunshine on a cloudy day.
Bunny: They seem like amazing kids.
Erin: They are, Bella is just like Jay, Mav is just like me and Drew is a combination of both of us. I really do want you to meet them, I just wanna make sure this is real. I can't break my kids heart, mines will heal but they're young.
Bunny: I understand, we can move at your pace. You tell me how you want to build this relationship, and I will do it.
Erin: I will talk with Jay and get his opinion, do you have a phone number I can reach you at?
Bunny: Yes, don't stress yourself out. We will take this one day at a time.
Erin: Thank you!

Erin and Bunny continued their lunch before erin brought Bunny back to the center. After having a serious heart to heart with Bunny she was feeling a lot lighter.  She's waited her whole life for this, and it finally happened. She still wanted to talk to Jay about everything, so when she got home she was ready to lay it all out for him.

Erin: Hey babe I'm home!
Jay: Shh, kids are down for a nap! How'd it go?
Erin: It went........