🌈And They Were Roommates! Vkook FF/✅

~ 9 ~

Jungkook POV

It's not like before.

We avoid each other as much as humanly possible.

Eat separately and don't use the living room couch in fear of running into the other.

My mind is a mess.

I don't like it.

Normally everything is in it's order, like folder for folder neatly paced in a bookshelf.

Everytime in the same order with their assigned color and name tag.

Not theses last few weeks.

One page suddenly flies by multiple times a day.

"Sexuality" is it's name.

There are the little stuff I remember about my Blinddates, my first kiss in 6th grade, and the many girls who gave me roses and chocolate on Valentine's Day.

And then in the biggest boldest letters, written in bright red marker is the name Kim Taehyung.

And a question mark.

What is it that I feel for him.

Of course he's a friend, we get along well and living together is comfortable as well.

But that night.

It threw everything around. I kissed him. I danced against his body.

I was drunk, but I knew what I was doing.

Who I was with and I did that.

Of Crouse Taehyung didn't have anything against it. Just like his other little encounters with men, it must've been to him just a way to forget everything and let loose.

That's what he does. So I should stop hoping.

Hoping that it was more, even though I don't know why I even hope it was for him.

Maybe it's my lonelyness?

Maybe the thought of being loved by someone is fooling my heart into this cruel mess.

It was nice. I can't deny that.

To feel so at home in someones arms, letting go for once not caring if it's right or males sense because it just feels right.

Letting the feelings guide instead of the rational brain.

I quietly slip out of my room to attend my next class when I meet Kim Taehyungs eyes.

I pass the couch, and there he lies, rapped in my baby blue blanket, dressed in sweats, popcorn crbs on his chin.

But he isn't alone.

There's another man beside him. Giggling at the movie that is playing on TV, head falling back as he laughs full hearted.

His dark bangs fall back, revealing eyes squished into crescent moons, smile big, white teeth shining.

Taehyungs arm is around his neck, resting on his shoulder, comfortably like they've been doing this for years.

Like a couple. A lovely couple cuddling under the covers while watching TV.

Loving each other.

For some reason it makes me angry.

There's a boiling hot heat throughout my body, I clench my fists.

Before I can act upon any evil plans of my hands I flee, throwing the door closed behind me as I rush into the hallway.

Is he interested in that boy?

Does he like him?

Like like him?

That didn't look like just friends or only sleeping with each other to me.

I rush to my class because I have no more time spend on my stupid messy brain.

I can't focus.

Again and again the image plays in my head. Like torture.

That one page flies by again: sexuality

And with the same big bold red marker I cross out his name.

No more Kim Taehyung.

Let's just endure the horrible blind dates until I find a smart, nice, beautiful girl my heart desires as much as my brain knows we would make sense.

Eventually I will.

Love will find its way to you when you're not searching they say.