The Revival of The Force

56 a second chance

56 a second chance

Over five generations of Jedis had reunited on Yavin IV. A round table, bigger than ten metres welcomed everyone. Ben sat uncomfortably on a chair. He chose a place where there wasn't a neighbour, but as the room filled up, the seats next to him were occupied. The hall was covered in a soft light, but it didn't have any windows nor lamps. Some Force mystery, Ben guessed.
Mace Windu stood up from his seat and every discussion stopped. "We thought, questioned, discussed. A straight line was drawn since the beginning of our existence here." While he spoke, he looked through the Assemble, stopped for a moment on Ben's face, but kept going. "Now, things have changed. Our strict limits have widened. Today, we are taking a decision that might change our lives." He sat back down.
"We have many split options in our Assemble," Qui-Gon Jinn took over. "The majority has decided for us."
Leia was the next to lift from her seat. "We admit that we have done a mistake and didn't come for help when it was needed. We apologise for that."
Ben's eyes met hers, but he looked down on his shaking hands. They were obviously talking about him. But what was the decision? His heart pace increased. Suddenly, his mind flashed back to a memory. One night where nothing important was happening on the Imperial ship, Ben lied in his bed, unable to close an eye. Even though Snoke was dead, he felt that still some Sith was watching him. He only waited to show up. Ben believed there was some time where no one could influence him on what was wrong and what was right. He closed his eyes to call for the Jedis. Not Darth Vader, but Anakin, his real grandfather without being hid under a mask. It took sometime, but he arrived. Anakin was unsure about talking to his grandson who lately was surrounded by Darkness. This was a proof of the Light that was still in him. Ben was confused about what to say too.
They looked at each other intensely until Anakin said: "You have a lot from your father."
This felt like a scar cracking open in his heart. Seeing the torture on Ben's face, Anakin pulled himself together. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you."
"It's okay," Ben silently said, his eyes locked to the ground.
"Why did you call?" Anakin asked.
"Because – I hope no one will notice that I am currently talking to Anakin Skywalker. And not Darth Vader," he replied without really giving an answer.
"You mean, since Snoke is dead," Anakin clarified.
"Yes, I've been wanting to talk to you since some time."
"To me? I thought the other me," Anakin answered. Again, he noticed that his words hurt. "I'm sorry for being rude. How can I help you, Ben?" he asked.
Ben jerked as he heard his name. "Can you tell me how to do this?" He responded desperate.
"To do what? You have to be more specific," Anakin replied.
"This. How to survive on the Dark Side of the Force when you're constantly driven by the other. Yet you have to wear this mask to pretend you're strong and all that counts is the Empire," Ben got out.
"I can't tell you how to do that. What I can say is that there is no need to wear any mask, literally and figuratively. Do what your heart wants you to do." He tapped on Ben's chest. "You're under the influence of Siths, you can stop it from deciding the reasoning of your heart. Without anyone noticing."
Anakin left him in his suite. Ben still felt his heart pounding in his chest and the light touch of his grandfather.
No one knew about this meeting, not any Jedi nor any Sith. Maybe Palpatine found out, but Ben stopped caring. He arrived back in the Assemble. The Jedis still talked about the changes that this event might cause. They repeat that it was exceptional and wouldn't happen any time again. Ben's heart couldn't stop from beating fast, he looked over to Anakin who smiled at him. In this moment, he stood up and declared what everything was about.
"The majority has decided to give Ben Solo, son of Leia Organa and Han Solo, a second chance. We aren't sure how this will happen for now, but we do have an idea. During his Dark Times and in the fight against Palpatine, we didn't give him enough support. So today, we decided this. A second chance for someone promising and powerful, also the last Skywalker. If anyone has something against this, please speak. We know that many also voted against, but the arguments should be known to everyone."
A second chance. For him. An exception. Ben didn't quite believe what was just said. The arguments, he didn't want to hear them. Many people are still hostile toward him. He heard "Kylo Ren", "killed many people", "acceptance", but he didn't listen. He knew all of it already.
"Thank you everyone. Now we want to hear Ben Solo," Luke stood up from his chair.
All eyes were driven to Ben, he still looked down. What was he supposed to say? He glanced to Leia who smiled encouragingly, Luke who nodded and Anakin. He didn't smile, but his glance gave him confidence.
"I – " His voice was stuck in his throat.
Luke decided to make it simpler for the young man and asked: "Do you like it here?"
Ben shook his head.
"Do you want to live?"
"Yes," Ben answered, letting the words and all the air in his lungs out at once.
"Why?"
"I have caused many problems, a lot of depts to pay. I want to be able to balance the bad things I've done with good. Maybe to have more good than bad."
"What would you do if you lived again?"
"I would teach Jedis with Rey, find new ones."
"Thank you, Ben Solo. We will come to you. The Assemble is over," Mace Windu declared. Ben didn't move from his chair, he kept sitting until all the magical lights turned off. Anakin arrived and sat down beside him.
"How do you feel?" he asked.
"I don't know if I deserve this," Ben said and looked at his grandfather.
"We will see that at the end of your life," he smiled.
"It's strange to think that I'm dead," Ben noticed.
"That's true," he said, both looking at the ground. "I'm proud of you. I believe that you will do great."
Ben, overwhelmed by the happiness, started crying. Anakin put an arm around his shoulders and gently stroke his back.
"I'm sorry," Ben excused himself.
"It's okay, don't need to apologise."
"Thank you, Anakin. For coming on this day," Ben said.
Anakin knew what he was talking about and nodded comprehensive.
"And for helping me, for giving me a second chance."
"I gave you what I didn't get," he answered.
They stayed silently in the dark some time.
Back in his empty Universe, Leia was the next to talk to Ben. Her eyes wore her sad expression. Ben's chin trembled under the emotion while Leia smiled. It was a proud smile.
"I guess I know what you have been waiting for now."
Ben didn't respond, overwhelmed by the goodbye.
"I'm sorry I couldn't show you any affection. I'm sorry for being cold with you. I'm sorry for being such a bad son – "
She interrupted him with a hug, tight and firm.
"We'll see us again, Ben," she whispered. She put her hands through his hair. "I'm really proud of you. I know that you'll do many beautiful things. I'll always be there for you, my son, don't worry."
From his eyes, tears were leaving abundantly, he didn't know it was so hard to say goodbye to his mother.
"May the Force be with you," she smiled and left him in the black space that had surrounded him for a long.