Connie: I respect this chart completely. The problem is the fact that the cover photo's making me have cheek boners. It's not healthy, trust me.
Sasha: I know. Hey, Hange, when can we change this?
Hange: the picture is not the problem. This is a list of awkward things happening here in the scouting legion. From 10-1.
Jean: I'm there aren't I?
Hange: take a wild guess, horsy. Anyways, number ten. Petra Ral.
Petra: yeah, what about me?
Hange: you never hang out with the other Levi squad members anymore and always put soy sauce on your toast.
Petra: okay. First of all, they've been really weird these days. Second, the soy sauce thing...Idek.
Hange: ... Number 9. Armin Arlert.
Armin: whyyy
Hange: you go at the girls' book club and have a schedule to cut your hair 0.01 inches shorter every 6 weeks and 3 days.
Armin: guys have stupid book clubs. And i don't want my hair any longer.
Eren: Hey, our book club is awesome.
Armin: ... Reading dead people's diaries is creepy, Eren. Very...very creepy.
Hange: 7. Mikasa Ackerman. You spend your precious time sitting on your bed listening to Beyonce's 7/11 song while meditating about hairy gophers.
Mikasa: ...
Don't judge me, woman.
Hange: Number 6. Erwin Smith.
Erwin: ... Damn
Hange: you wear fake rainbow beards during lunch break at your office while watching Titanic.
Isabel: what's wrong with that?
Hange: on mute.
Isabel: Oh...Erwin, you got some real problems.
Erwin: my ways are not to be judged. Now, number five.
Hange: Jean Kirstein. He bangs his head on the laptop keyboard while reading Marco jokes with L.A love playing on your MP3 player.
Eren: wha...
Jean: NUMBER FOUR...EREN YEAGER...
Hange: you've been busting into people's business. Like literally, you play Talk Dirty on your iPod while busting into people's rooms.
Eren: ... Hehe...
Hange: three. Sasha, Connie and Isabel. You guys are really dangerous prankers. Everyone knows what you do since...well you pranked everyone.
Sasha, Connie and Isabel: ... *runs away
Hange: number two, Reiner Braun. You act really gossipy, braggy ass-ish to everyone in the regiment.
Reiner: that's cause I'm awesome.
Petra: you can't even lift a 1 pound weigh. Even Krista can do it.
Reiner: ... It was a heavy dust day.
Hange: number one and a half...Levi Ackerman...
Everyone: *stares at Levi suspiciously
Levi: ... Hange don't chu date explain it. Everyone, if you wanna see my awkward problem, look this up on YouTube. I'm an asshole.
Hange: number one. It's time...children
Everyone: *suspense
Hange: *opens file* oh crap...
Krista: what is it? Or who is it?
Hange: it's me...
Levi: she's been recording everything that's happening and converting it into a retarted Uptown Funk parody called "Recon ****". And reads fifty shades of grey while editing.
Everyone: ...
Hange: ... Don't judge me *runs away
YOU ARE READING
SNK shorts
FanfictionThis story just contains several Attack on titan shorts made just for fun,there are no lines here that relate to the real Shingeki no kyojin, this was only made for the entertainment of you peeps. I am not offending the show or the people who made i...
