Daddy Dearest

Chapter Thirty-Six

Melody

When I'm with Alex, he eclipses all of my worries. I think it's because there's just so much of him. Chambers tends to be anything and everything. Lover, brother, boyfriend, father, and shelter.

That's the scary part about him. Nancy raised me to be an independent woman who doesn't need a man to have a full life, and I always believed that this was something I could do. However, I've come to depend on Alex for so many things. I'm not being very fair. Mainly, Alex has become my security blanket.

Don't get me wrong; I love everything that Alex and I do. He makes me feel so good, and I hope I do the same for him because I know he loves me. But I haven't been very fair to him.

Every time I have an inappropriate thought about Ben, I attack Alex. And it's working. I think I'm almost over Ben. I barely even think about him anymore... except after every time I see him.

But he'll be gone to a different school in a couple of weeks, and I never have to see him again, and I can start trying to forget that this whole embarrassing chapter of my life ever happened.

Even though I spent all of my life with the Davenport clan, I'm perfectly willing to cut ties with them once I leave for England because I did an unforgivable thing. From my best friends, I tried to take their dad away. From my second mom, I tried to take her husband away.

I fucked up, so I'm trying to stay away as far as possible, and Alex has been helping me do that. He makes an excellent buffer.

The thing is, I do love Alex, and I'm terrified he'll find out about the whole Ben thing and get grossed out. I don't want to lose Alex. I've already lost so many people in my life.

I love Ben. I always have in some fashion, and it's multi-layered. But Alex Chambers is the first guy I've ever loved purely. And he loves me, Melody, solely for me.

Not because I'm Harry's daughter or remind him of my mother, whom I closely resemble. I can't be someone else's memory. I have to be me.

I went after Alex because I wanted Charlie to think I was unavailable, but maybe the real reason is that I knew he'd love me for me, and I needed someone.

I need him now.

"Melody?" Alex is between my legs, holding up a square foil packet. "Are you sure?"

Alex is superbly built. Broad shoulders, muscled chest, and abs of steel. He boxes to keep fit and practices a Russian martial art called Systema, which is pretty hardcore and used by the Russian special forces. He is freakishly strong. So hot.

My mouth goes dry as I stare at him. We've done fingers and tongues, and I've had him in my mouth, so I know how big he is, but I've never had him in my vagina, so I'm a little nervous.

"Oh, yeah, I'm way sure," I tell him with a thumbs up.

He laughs at me and stretches his body atop mine so he can kiss my neck. "Plum, we don't have to do this until you're ready, I told you." He nuzzles my throat all the way back to my ear and bites my lobe. "I'm willing to wait for as long as I have to for you."

"Why?" I skip my arms around his neck and plant kisses on his temple and the side of his face. "I'm a pain in the ass."

"You are, but you're my pain in the ass." He dips his head and bites my clavicle. "Though I have to tell you, cricket, I'm pretty turned on right now."

I look down and stick my tongue into my cheek. "I know. Me too." I take a deep breath. "I'm ready."

His amber eyes darken until they're almost brown. "Are you sure?" The pitch of his voice drops. "I want you to be absolutely sure. I don't want you to regret this."