Only Mine {Book 2}| Completed

Chapter 51: Christmas Eve Pt.3

           Chapter 51: Christmas Eve Pt. 3

C H R I S T O P H E R: 🥀

When I had entered back into my old room that I clearly missed, it looked the same. My room looked different than from how it looked last Christmas. I destroyed it last year. But I guess Edward and mom had cleaned up the mess I made.

I dropped my duffle bag to my feet that slammed down. I saw the room that I clearly miss it so badly I kinda forgot about it. I had left my door open, and I know Mandy went into Emma's room to kinda stick her book bag at. I'm actually just going to unpack it instead of leaving it in my duffle. I had taken everything out and placing it into my drawers that are basically empty.

I saw my book shelves still stacked with plenty of books. Books that I knew mattered back then. I had taken out my clothes for my stay and kept them folded and placed them neatly into the drawer, leaving them there. Along with a cologne I left on my dresser. And my toothbrush I left on my dresser and I had just put it all away in a drawer.

It didn't take long for Mandy to actually join me by knocking on my opened door. She looked exactly how I picture her. The girl that I probably would have dated when I moved here for my senior year instead of April. But Mandy was taken and already serious about Aaron. But if she wasn't, I would have dated her in a heartbeat. I guess it's not hard to say that I have a type, and that type means someone who is perfect.

I didn't think I would be standing here for the holidays with Mandy. I know we're not dating but she is a good friend and a good friends with benefits. I never actually enjoyed having it with anyone besides the girl that I'm still in love with. And Mandy kinda helps me take my mind off that. And I can be free. And I can be myself.

"Hello handsome," Mandy commented, with a big smile on her face.

  "Hey," was all I could really say.

"This room...." she entered fully into my room, spinning around looking at it. "It is the room I never got to see whenever Emma and I saw each other. You were just the boy in his shorts, working out and listening to B.O.B."

I chuckled at the memory. I definitely remember just kinda locking myself away. I did hear Emma watching Grey's Anatomy plenty of times during those occasions.

   "I remember those times. But I wasn't allowed to be near you both, remember?" I reminded her. I felt a little awkward actually talking about this.

   "Look, you don't have to make it weird just because we're sleeping together now." She nudged me jokingly.

   "Is it weird?" I asked her.

I could see the confusion and disagreement on her face towards me.

"Of course not." She replied almost instantly. "But it is weird having Emma gawking at us when she saw us arrive together. She has the most beautiful amazing boyfriend. She probably has it all with him. It's no wonder she got back together with him right away."

I felt resentment towards Emma when I saw her there. Of course, she looked beautiful. She was wearing the most perfect dress. Her hair was put up except I don't exactly like it like that. I always loved it when she let it down lose. And she's still beautiful with her lovely brown eyes and the feminine smile. How am I supposed to walk away from it all? How can Emma think that I can just let her go so easily? And just seeing Noah made it all very uncomfortable. And not only that, I have to give half of my room to Noah to sleep in. At least it's for one night.

    I actually can't imagine just passing through my life without actually loving Emma. But I think Emma was pissed when she saw us both standing there. I was a total asshole downstairs. And I'm being so fucking petty because I have a right. Mostly because she got back together with Noah like it was so fucking easy. I know exactly what it was like. I know everything she told me. I know he is an abusive manipulative compulsive toxic narcissistic guy. I know he let his own brother assault her without consent. I know he was abusive. He left bruises on her that she showed me. And after all that... she just went back to Noah so fucking quickly. I didn't even have a chance to process it through. And to be fair, I'm so surprised that Edward is okay with that.