Only Mine {Book 2}| Completed

Chapter 30: Thanksgiving Pt. 1

         Chapter 30: Thanksgiving Pt 1

                              E M M A: 🌹

    When we arrived at mom's I had a sudden feeling of anxiety. Noah was so full of confidence and he was able to just step right out of the car and actually be able to go. He had his hand move from my knee and then we both just sat in silence as I was nervous of how today would be. I know mom likes Noah but I'm not sure about Gavin so much. I mean, I know dad says he likes Noah but a part of me feels like he actually hates Noah and he's pretending he likes him because he wants me to be happy.

I stared at the driveway that I remember arriving in once I had been taken here to after getting out of the institution. But this house and this driveway it has always put a smile on my face. It's definitely cozy and I guess I could actually just enjoy the holiday here. And I just wanted to see mom because it hasn't been for a minute. But now I'm actually proud to be the daughter of my mother and also my mother.

I think I'm just feeling all of this guilt because I am not seeing my father. And I have treated him poorly but I actually really hate him because of everything I have gone through because of him. And I actually can't just forgive him after everything he has done. But I do care about my father, but I'm just mad at him because of how he refused to let me be with someone I really did love. And then he sent me to an institution, and never saw me once. And then after acted like everything was perfect and everything was okay. And still he is trying to get forgiveness from me. And I will say it's not gonna happen. He hurt me and I can't forgive him. Two years ago for both holidays I spent it with him and Colleen. But now I'm finally spending it with mom.

The car was turned off and I sat in complete silence and I could tell Noah had something on his mind that was full of so much concern for me. His seatbelt had been taken off and he just looked at me so worriedly.

"Are you okay, Emma?" He leaned in a bit towards me, because it somehow makes me feel better, even though I'm anxious but also excited of how today will be.

  "I'm just a little nervous. It's the first time I will spending it with my mom and without my dad. So...I'm just a bit worried how this'll turn out. And am I hurting my father too?" I said to him, and he listened which is what I love about Noah is that he listens.

    He held both of my hands which forced me to look right at him, staring into his brown eyes, that gave me extreme excitement and confidence in him. The guy I have been so desperately taken away with. And there's no way I could hate him. But maybe all those times he lost his temper and accidentally hit me was just an accident and he just never meant to hurt me.

   "I know you love your dad." He sighed. "But he never took the responsibility of how he had treated you when he got married to someone right after he divorced your mother. It's your turn to spend it with your mom. And I think she needs you."

   Noah is right. He's definitely right. He's right. I need to just spend the holiday with my mom and just make it the best I can because two years ago dad kept me as this happy little girl after my mom left. And I spent both Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years and Easter with him. And I didn't see my mom. So I'm just gonna put a smile on my face and pretend and act like my dad doesn't exist. At least for a little while.

  "Am I wrong to think that I'm making a mistake here?" I asked, my heart racing so fast that I felt terrified about all of this.

    Noah had put his arm over the back of my seat by the headrest and over to around my shoulder, getting close to me.

   "Babe, I don't think your making a mistake. Your having judgment because your feeling guilty. And I'm telling you is that it's not crazy." He said.