Only Mine {Book 2}| Completed

Chapter 10: We Can Never Go Back

     Chapter 10: We Can Never Go Back

                C H R I S T O P H E R: 🥀

  
    I wasn't interested in going to a party. Things have just been crazy for me these past weeks, months and days. And everyone close to me knows that. Even my neighbors in the complex know that. But I wasn't going to mope and be crazy. I'm tired of having girl problems with every girl I have close to me.

    It reminds me of when I dated of April. The way our relationship went. It was always her drama affecting us. And I guess the idea of dating Peach makes me think of April. Peach is a rich girl. And I don't wanna interfere in that. And her parents are like strict and old fashioned. They live like it's 1954. They have maids, butlers and cooks. Something I'm not quite okay with. But it's like everyone has pestered me to be with her. And after this morning of the fight I had with Peach it makes me feel so guilty. But was I wrong?

    After work I had to go to another stupid therapeutic session. And I talked with Dr. Jade about it. And she thinks I'm afraid to face love again and that I really am in love with Peach. But she's wrong. I'm not in love with Peach. I'm in love with Emma. The only girl I will chase after. I would cross a river and every ocean for her. And climb every mountain just to be with her.

I had met up with Ty at his apartment and he tried inviting me to this party he was going to. It was that asshole Clay Morris. Because I know if I go that Axel will be there. And I know Axel will be there getting drunk. Just like everyone so I wanna not go and be wasted. And I guess I'm nervous about having to maybe run into someone I hate. And plus, Axel is still threatened by me and thinks that I want fuck Lara Jean. And only I can say that it is not true. If I wanted to sleep with Lara Jean I think I would have already done it. And the last time I was at a party I was drunk. And I'm not counting the yacht party on my birthday.

I had been home for some time since after my shift from work, after seeing Dr. Jade, and even making a quick visit with Ty. And I basically had sat home in my nice apartment with my nice flat screen TV and I was watching a pre-recorded game. I usually would invite Liam over to watch it with me. But today I feel kinda down. I guess I feel upset with everything that happened with Peach. It's like she can't no for an answer. I'm not wrong this time. I may be a jerk. But this time I'm not wrong. I know what I want and what I don't want. Screw my friends. Because their all trying to get inside my head. And there's no way I'm letting that happen.

I keep replaying and replaying the image of how Peach looked at me. I saw she was hurting me. I would call her, but I think we need space. The both of us. And I don't wanna be pushy or sound like I'm being overbearing. If Peach really cares about me she'll call me and be my friend. And maybe keeping space from Peach is a good thing. Just like Emma said in that stupid letter that she wants to keep space. I can respect it, I think. She needs time to herself. I can't imagine what she went through in that hell hole. But I just wanna see her. I did speak to Rachel this morning and she told me it would be okay if I dropped by.

Los Angeles is a five hour drive. And so I quickly I had decided on getting out of these stupid clothes. And I decided getting in something comfortable. So I wore nice faded jeans and a plain white shirt. And I had wore my favorite cologne. And I put on my shoes. I saw Marshmallow being lazy like I was just a couple minutes ago. And so, I had just ignored the concept of watching a game of how awful the Steelers are right now. Something Emma would be laughing at.

I had turned off the TV from the loud shouts and screams of a crowd. At least it's not some kind of basketball game. I had hugged Marshmallow because I hate being apart from him for too long. He has water and food and I got the AC on. Because I can't allow Marshmallow to be stuck in here on one of the hottest days in San Francisco.